Hotel Anderson
by Redrose001
Summary: Sherlock has a small mishap with some chemicals and blows up 221B. Anderson volunteers to let the blogger detectives live with him in his flat.
1. A slight mishap

_Disclaimer: I unfortunately don't own Sherlock and blah blah blah…_

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It was a normal sleepy Sunday morning in 221B Baker Street. John was recovering from his night at the pub with Lestrade and the other members of Scotland Yard. The night at the pub happened at least once a month where all the police and honorary members of the Yard like John would complain about Sherlock mostly and occasionally about cases while they got drunk. Sherlock knew about the monthly session they had was about him and he didn't care as John didn't complain about things to him and it made life so much easier for the both of them. Right now John was in his armchair with a newspaper and a cup of tea.

Sherlock was in the kitchen with a new experiment of his: to see how long it takes for an eye to dissolve in certain chemicals. It involved eyeballs and several explosive chemicals. In one of the beakers he had a mixture of two chemicals that turned bright blue when mixed together. Sherlock used tweezers to pick up one of the eyeballs that were in a container and inspected it. Sherlock managed to get into a bit of a staring completion with the eye. The eye won. Sherlock dropped they eye into the beaker with the chemicals and the liquid turned a pale green and fizzed a little as the eye entered the mixture. So far the experiment was going as planned and it looked like he would be finished by lunch time. Sherlock placed the beaker on the Bunsen burner and lit it up. In the last beaker had a bright red liquid that was highly explosive and flammable, it was banned in most countries, Mycroft had given it to him as a reward for not smoking. The red chemical had to added slowly and at the right amount , too much and it would explode. Sherlock didn't know how much he needed mostly because he never read instructions for anything and he just guessed everything most of the time. Sherlock filled a syringe with the chemical and placed several drops in the beaker with the eyeball. After a few drops nothing happened and the eye remained whole. Sherlock shrugged and added another drop.

The moment the last drop went into the beaker the eye started to dissolve quickly. Sherlock decided that night he would congratulate himself with some cigarettes for getting the experiment done before lunch. He was writing notes in his book when he smelt something strange. It smelt of petrol and burning. Sherlock looked up and saw that the beaker had black smoke coming from it and it was filling the Kitchen.

Sherlock placed down his pen as the kitchen was nearly completely covered in black smoke and the smell was getting stronger. The experiment was going to explode. The only word that came out of him mouth was, " Oh crap."

John had finished of his cuppa and his paper and was going into the kitchen to make another one. Sherlock burst through the door and grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the flat.

"Sherlock ,what is happening?" John asked as he narrowly avoided going face first into the door frame. Sherlock mumbled something about how Mycroft was an idiot for giving him that chemical. "Sherlock, why are we leaving the flat?"

Sherlock pushed John out of the main door. "Where is Mrs Hudson?" he asked. He hoped that she wasn't in the flat, he couldn't let her be harmed thanks to him.

"At her sister's house." John answered. He had not a clue what was happening , less than two minutes ago he was reading his paper and now he was outside the flat as black smoke came out of the window. Sherlock let out a sigh of relief, Mrs Hudson was safe.

Within seconds the flat was completely covered in smoke and the sound of glass shattering filled the silent street with noise. People started to come out of their flats to see what happened. The smoke cleared slightly to show that most of the front wall of the flat was gone. In the back of the flat a fire was spreading. Sherlock turned to John, "I had a slight mishap with the experiment." Seconds later Sherlock had a fist in his face and he was on the floor.

Sherlock and John stared at what was now their flat. It wasn't exactly suitable for anything to live in anymore. They were homeless. John remained quiet and remembered all the happy moments that happened in the flat. Sherlock on the other hand was more concerned about how the body parts in the fridge were.

"How are the two of you doing?" asked Lestrade. What a stupid question! Lestrade mentally slapped himself. Of course both of them weren't doing fine, they were homeless! They had lost the Sherlock cave!

"Just completely fine!" Sherlock grumbled as he ran to a fireman to snatch away the human head that he was carrying

"Fine apart from we are homeless and we have nowhere to go." John moaned "Harry is back on the drink and I am not staying with her. Sherlock would rather live in the flat than be with Mycroft. And the both of us can't be in a hotel as Sherlock is banned from most of them, for mostly stupid reasons."

"I would let you stay in my flat until yours is fixed up. But unfortunately my brother and his kids are staying over at the moment. I'm sorry." Greg apologised, he couldn't imagine what Sherlock and John were feeling. He wondered on how they could stay calm in a situation like this. If this had happened to him he would be in tears.

Anderson shuffled closer to Greg to hear the conversation that took place. Just as Greg said he couldn't take the Dynamic Duo in. without thinking he said "You can stay with me. My mother has moved out and there is another spare room." Sherlock and John had matching expressions on their face of total surprise. Anderson regretted saying that , the moment it came out of this mouth. He had offered to let the Freak stay in his flat. What had he done? He didn't mind John staying with him as he never did anything to bother him. On the other hand Sherlock breathing annoyed him.

"You still live with your mother?" Sherlock broke the silence before laughing "That is so sad. You are in your thirties and you live with your mother."

"She lived with me. I made her pay rent" Anderson spluttered with his face turning pink.

Sherlock knew he was lying. "It's still sad though. Did you need the company after your wife left you?" Sherlock stopped laughing when John elbowed him in the ribs. "John that.."

"Are you sure?" John cut off Sherlock "We don't want to be a hassle for you. And we will pay rent and-"

"John be quiet. We are doing Anderson a great favour. He will have the famous Baker Street Blogger and Case solvers in his flat, think of all the benefits that he will get for having us stay with him." Sherlock placed his decapitated head in Anderson's arms. Anderson went pale and dropped the head.

"Have you inhaled the fumes?" Anderson asked he noticed that Sherlock didn't scold him for dropping the head. Sherlock noticed walking into the street was someone holding an umbrella and wearing an expensive suit.

Sherlock grabbed hold of John and Anderson and started dragging them to a taxi. "Let's go and see our new home then."

After Sherlock shoved Anderson into the car, John asked "I thought you would rather be homeless than live with Anderson?"

"True, but I would rather live with him than with my brother." Sherlock shrugged "Also it means that I get to look around his apartment and find things for blackmail. And I can see what his bedroom looks like under a black light. Also I can see how bad his dinosaur obsession is." Sherlock listed off.

John got into the taxi "Of course you do." He sighed "Try and be on your best behaviour when we are in Anderson's flat. He is very generous for letting us stay with him."

Sherlock got into the car "I am always on my best behaviour. But I will try for your sake." Sherlock said reluctantly

"Good. Otherwise if you misbehave there will be no crime scenes for a month." John growled.

"Fine I will behave." Sherlock sighed "And for the last time John, you are not my mother!"

Anderson wondered what he had gotten himself into and hoped that 221B would be repaired soon.

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This will be a series of shorts of Sherlock and John living with Anderson. Feel free to give me ideas and I will use them for new chapters. Thank you in advance.


	2. Body parts

_Disclaimer: I unfortunately don't own Sherlock and all rights go to the BBC and blah blah blah..._

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"Your flat smells funny." Were the first words that came out of Sherlock's mouth as he entered the flat. He threw down his suitcase that contained his items that weren't too damaged. He strode into the kitchen and placed the head in the fridge after removing some items.

"You are not keeping that in my fridge." Anderson stormed into the kitchen and removed the head from the fridge and placed it in the bin and slammed down the lid. "You are not keeping any body parts in my flat." Sherlock reached back into the bin and picked up the head and opened the fridge door and was about to place it back in, when the door was slammed and narrowly avoided Sherlock's fingers. "You are not keeping body parts in my fridge!" Anderson repeated slowly "What part of that did you not understand?"

"I understood all of that sentence, Anderson." Sherlock sighed "I need to keep the head in the fridge as I am doing an experiment."

"Oh no you are not; you are banned from doing any more experiments." John interjected "Anderson has been kind enough to let us live in his home and you are going to respect his wishes." John turned around to Anderson and mouthed 'I'm sorry'. Anderson nodded and went back to disposing the head that was now on the kitchen table.

"John, you can't tell me what to do. You're not my mother!" Sherlock crossed his arms, his hands clenched into fists.

"I'm not your mother, but you are going to do what I tell you." John used what he called his 'army voice' that got people to do what he wanted. "You are doing what Anderson tells you to during the time we are staying here. If you don't do as you are told, I will make you stay with Mycroft." Sherlock sighed and muttered something under his breath. "Do you have any more body parts with you?"

Sherlock stayed quiet for a moment before saying "No."

John stared at Sherlock for a minute before annoying "You're lying to me." After living with Sherlock for a while, John discovered that if he went quiet before answering meant that he was lying. "Anderson go and check his bag for body parts."

Anderson went into the suitcase and opened it slowly. There was a few shirts and his skull and violin, but other than that the suitcase was filled of body parts. A jar of eyes stared at him and he felt uncomfortable so he slowly closed the case. Anderson who was now considerably paler than usual and feeling slightly nauseated, slowly walked back into the kitchen and sat down in a chair. He knew that he used to seeing body parts and other disgusting things as that was part of the job, but it didn't mean that he liked to look at them. "His bag is full of body parts." He said quietly.

John crossed his arms "You are in big trouble with me. You are going to return all those body parts to the morgue and then you are grounded. You are not allowed to do any cases for a week." Sherlock grabbed his skull from the case and stormed up stairs and went into an empty bedroom. He was obviously sulking and didn't come down for the rest of the evening.

Once the body parts were taken back to the morgue, Anderson and John sat on the sofa with some crap TV in the background and a few beers. "I don't know how you can live with him John; it's like being with a child." Anderson complained. John snorted as he knew that Sherlock could be a lot worse. If Anderson was complaining after one simple argument, how would he cope when Sherlock was in a bad mood?

The next day Sherlock was ungrounded as Lestrade insisted that he had to help for a case. And he threatened that if Sherlock didn't come he would make Anderson lose his job. After that threat Anderson was willing not to complain about body parts as it stopped Sherlock from getting grounded again and he could keep his job.

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Thank you for reading and if you have any ideas please feel free to mention them and I might use them.


	3. Things Sherlock is not allowed to do

Disclaimer: I don't own Sherlock and I will probably will never own it. All rights belong to the BBC and others.

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Sherlock was home alone and he was bored. He couldn't annoy John as he had a date and he couldn't annoy Anderson as he was at the Yard. He wasn't allowed to do any experiments that involved chemicals since John was still upset about the flat. It had been a week already and he was still upset about it, Sherlock didn't understand why he would be though. John only had most of his belongings destroyed and his files on his laptop were gone as well, couldn't he just buy new things and not complain about losing them?

It had been a week since they moved in with Anderson and it was boring. Anderson had so many rules about things and made them sign this document saying that they agreed to them. Sherlock didn't like any of them as they kept him from doing interesting things. Most of the rules were things applied to Sherlock, only a few applied to the both of them such as: if the milk carton is empty go to the shop and get a new one. Sherlock's list of rules were:

1. No body parts in the fridge – as people like to eat food and not body parts that look like food.

Anderson had not forgiven him for the fingers that were covered in batter so they looked like chicken strips. It had been a slightly uncomfortable lunch time for all the residents of the flat, especially after Anderson took a bite out of a 'chicken strip' and it ended with John yelling at Sherlock and later grounding Sherlock, while all this happened Anderson was throwing up in the sink after realising what he had just eaten.

2. Sherlock is not allowed to cook or make anything unsupervised – as people like to eat food and not feel scared about eating something that isn't considered a normal thing to eat.

A similar reaction had occurred that was similar to the 'human finger chicken strips incident'. But this time Sherlock had made dinner that was chopped up monkey that he had claimed that was 'beef'. When they found out it was by Sherlock making a random comment about the meal. This ended up with Anderson throwing up and also scrubbing his tongue with a brush. Sherlock had a camera in the room and put the video on the internet, it had over a million views already.

3. Don't ask questions about dinosaurs – as it will result in an angry Anderson and he is almost as bad as an angry Sherlock.

Sherlock learned the hard way that Anderson only could tolerate only a few questions about his apparent dinosaur obsession. Anderson he didn't have one, he didn't know why people thought he did. He thought dinosaurs were cool and that was his extent of his liking. After Sherlock had filled his locker in the yard with an inflatable pool toy that was a dinosaur, everyone had been giving him a lot more grief, they had given him the nickname of 'Andersaurs' and covered his cubical with dinosaur posters with his head photo shopped on them and plastic dinosaurs. Also the most questionable thing he got that day was a book of pictures with people in their underwear in apparently 'sexy' poses wearing dinosaur masks. Anderson knew that Sherlock was the cause of that as he was mad at him for not letting him keep intestines in this bedroom. The night ended up with a broken violin and John getting knocked out by the skull.

No one is allowed in Anderson's bedroom – as people like to have privacy.

Sherlock didn't see any reason why he wasn't allowed in the bedroom. Maybe Anderson kept something embarrassing in his room such as women's clothes or he didn't want anyone to see his room under a black light. Normally when you are told not to do something, it makes you want to do it even more than you did before. And since Sherlock was bored he decided to go into Anderson's bedroom and find what he could find. Grabbing a black light that he stole from the yard and a camera he ventured forth.

Later that evening when they were sitting around the dinner table with their meal of burgers, they had the normal tea time squabble that consisted of John trying to get Sherlock to eat. Sherlock was refusing to eat but kept a smirk on his face. Anderson picked at his food, for the past week food had made him slightly nervous ever since the 'human finger chicken strips incident'. "What meat is this from?" he asked John who was currently shoving a plate towards Sherlock and he was moving it back.

"Beef." John answered as he sent his 'Inner solider glare' to Sherlock. When he used the inner solider glare it said only one thing: 'If you don't do as you are told, I will kill you with my bare hands and mount your head above the fireplace.' When he used it things tended to work in his favour. The glare worked as Sherlock reluctantly started to pick at his food.

"Are you sure about that?" Anderson asked as he opened up the bun and sniffed the burger.

John sighed "It said it was beef on the packet and I don't think Tesco's would lie to us about their meat especially after the horse meat scandal of last year."

Anderson pointed at Sherlock "Has he touched the food in any way before it has been served?"

Sherlock replied "I haven't. I was too busy doing more interesting things while you two were gone. I made a fascinating discovery today. And it didn't involve chemicals or body parts today."

"That is great Sherlock." John smiled "If you keep up with this, you can do some experiments in the lab with your intestines that Molly gave you." John was glad that Sherlock had finally started to learn the flat rules and was respecting them even though it took a lot of blood sweat and tears from him and Anderson. "So what did you find out today?"

Sherlock answered happily with a smirk "That Anderson keeps questionable things in his bedroom." Anderson went pale "And under the black light his room looks like if there has been an explosion in a yoghurt factory." Anderson shifted himself down his seat and face planted the table, his head going into his plate. "I've got pictures." Sherlock smiled even though that Anderson would do something back to him, but he had the feeling it wouldn't happen in a while.

John did the only sensible thing he could go and left the room before the argument started. Minutes later he could hear raised voices, insults and plates smashing. Knowing that he made the right choice he decided to go and see what Lestrade was doing that night and hopping that he could sleep on his sofa that night, as there was no chance that he will be able to sleep with the two overgrown children arguing.

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Thank you all for reading. I would love to hear any ideas from you for new chapters. Hopefully since I have done the first few chapters for Sherlock and John moving in the rest will be a lot funnier as they will be more random and creative.


	4. Early morning baking

Disclaimer: I don't own Sherlock and all rights belong to the BBC

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John opened his eyes and the first thing he saw was Sherlock's face only a breath away from his. John let out a yelp and instinctively punched him in the face. When he was in the army if someone was standing that close to you in the middle of the night, you tended to attack them even if they were on your side. Sherlock should have known this by now as they had lived together for two years, but he had probably 'deleted' it as it wasn't important enough to keep. John thought that Sherlock's brain was amazing most of the time, but so infuriating that he decided that basic information like how not to get punched in the face was not worth keeping. John looked over the side on the bed and found Sherlock on the floor holding his nose.

"Sorry about that Sherlock." John whispered as he checked the clock on his phone "Is there a reason why you are up at three in the morning?"

Sherlock slowly got up from the floor and removed his hand from his nose as to let John look at it. "I need your help with something."

John sighed "Did you get glue in your hair again? I am not helping you with that again. I don't think my eyes have recovered from seeing you with a shaved head." John shuddered it wasn't a good day for both of the men involved as John had spent the whole day trying to remove superglue from the detectives hair and gave up and ended up shaving his head. After that Sherlock had refused to go outside or see anyone else for several months and if he had to go outside he had to wear the deerstalker.

Sherlock stroked his hair protectively "I haven't touched glue ever since the incident." The reason for that was that he was paranoid that he would get into his hair and Sherlock Holmes does not look good bald. John switched on the light and scanned Sherlock's appearance. His eyes discovered white flour covered his clothes and hair, he was wearing an apron that said 'Hot stuff' on the front, egg was down the leg of his trousers and it was dripping down on to his shoe and on his face there was a splatter of chocolate batter. Either Sherlock was creating a new form of life using kitchen items or he was baking.

John decided that he would go with the option of baking as Sherlock was still banned from doing experiments and there wasn't much in the kitchen you could use to create a life form with. "Sherlock, why are you baking at three in the morning?" he asked "I didn't imagine you to be much of a chef"

Sherlock looked down at the ground "I thought that we should give Anderson something to say thank you for letting us stay."

"You could say thank you by not putting body parts in his fridge or not photoshopping his face onto a dinosaur and then posting pictures of that around the Yard." John commented "Is there any other reasons you want to bake him something?"

"He is still a bit upset about me going into his bedroom and he won't talk to me." The truth was that Anderson was doing more than not talking to Sherlock and if they did talk it would just end up in them shouting and something getting broken. Anderson had told Greg that Sherlock was not allowed to do any cases, mostly that he was paranoid that Sherlock would mention anything about his room to anyone. Also when Sherlock walked into a room that he was in, he would leave and flick him the bird as he left the room. John had noticed how tense the flat had become and he would spend as little time as possible in the flat, mostly all he did was go to a café and write his blog until closing time.

John smirked "You just want to go to cases again, so you are hoping that if you make a cake for him he will let Greg give you cases again, am I right?" Sherlock only nodded. "Right, come on then." said John as he started to drag him to the kitchen.

"Sherlock, what have you done?" John exclaimed as he looked at the kitchen he had seen cleaner crime scenes than the state the kitchen now. Eggs were smashed everywhere and all over the floor, a river of milk and other liquids was formed on the floor, flour covered every surface, cake batter dripped down from the ceiling and onto John's head. The only clean thing in the kitchen at the moment was the mixing bowl that was empty as the ingredients decided to go anywhere in the kitchen apart from the bowl. John wondered how a person could turn a kitchen into a war zone, well the person who did this was Sherlock Holmes and it was sometimes best not to ask questions if it involved him.

Sherlock threw a box towards John it said 'Easy to make cakes'. "John the box lied, they said it was easy to make." Sherlock complained. John laughed the great Sherlock Holmes was defeated by a box of cake mix. "I don't know how they can claim 'Even a man could do it' on the box. I'm a genius and I can't figure it out."

John shoved the box in the bin, and started to pull out ingredients from the cupboards and placed the correct amount in the bowl. Sherlock peered inside the bowl acting that it was going to explode at any moment. "It is not going to explode if you touch it." John commented before passing the bowl and a wooden spoon towards Sherlock "Do you think that you will be able to stir the mixture and put in the oven once the lumps are gone. I'm going to start to clean up and I'll let you decorate the cake yourself."

Sherlock scoffed "John I am not an idiot, I will be able to put a cake in the oven without blowing up the kitchen." Sherlock started to slowly stir the mixture until it went to the right constancy and he went into the cupboard and grabbed a small bottle of vanilla extract and a pack of chocolate chips . He carefully measured the correct amounts of the ingredients and put them in the bowl. After that he placed the mixture in the pan and gave it to John to look at. John carefully inspected the tray to make sure that Sherlock didn't add poison to it. John praised him for the cake and helped him put it in the oven, now that was put out of the way the two men started to tidy up the kitchen.

They talked about random things while they waited for the cake in the oven, they discussed topics such as how they should make Mycroft a cake to ruin his diet to how they should decorate the cake. "And that is why I am making the cake a dinosaur…" Sherlock trailed off before pushing John out of the kitchen right before the oven exploded leaving the glass panel at the front smashed. "I think we are going to need another oven." Sherlock muttered and John just nodded.

So during the rest of the morning Sherlock and John decorated the cake and bought and installed a new oven. By some miracle Anderson was still asleep but it could be due to the fact that he wasn't used to Sherlock playing his violin badly in the early hours of the morning. Later once they had disposed of the oven and finished with the cake, Anderson had come down the stairs at around eleven in the morning with serious bed head and his pyjamas.

"Morning Philip!" John greeted as he put the last of the dishes in the cupboard. Sherlock was looking at him with a Cheshire cat grin, before he could ask why Sherlock was looking at him like that, a cake was shoved to him on the table.

Anderson was surprized that Sherlock and John had made a cake for him and the kitchen was still in one piece. The cake was in the shape of a dinosaur and was covered in green icing and had the words 'I'm rawy sorry' written on it with John's insistence.

Sherlock was nudged by John to say "I just wanted to thank you for taking us in and to say sorry about me going into your room and embarrassing you." Anderson smiled maybe things were going to get better with him and Sherlock now and it would make living with each other so much easier.

John began to cut the cake while Sherlock went to get plates and looked out of the back door where behind the shed there was an empty oven box and the exploded oven. He made the mental note to get rid of the evidence soon before he had to solve the case of the new oven.

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Thank you for reading. Please feel free to write down any ideas and I may use them in a future chapter.


	5. The birthday dinosaur

Disclaimer: Sherlock doesn't belong to me and all rights go to the BBC ect

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Anderson wasn't a person who would make a large fuss out of his birthday, to him it was just another day and it meant that he was a year closer to dying. He would often spend his birthday just getting slightly tipsy and watching Jurassic Park mostly as he couldn't think of anything better to do than get drunk and watch dinosaurs. Sherlock was the first one to find out about his birthday, they had a fight and it ended up with Anderson whipping out his driving licence and shoving it in Sherlock's face. Sherlock had just grinned and mentioned that he would have something special planned. From that sentence Anderson knew that the worst was about to come.

John was quick to reassure him that nothing bad will happen, but that didn't provide any relief to him though, mostly as John had no clue what was happening and just went along with Sherlock's plans. He only had a few days before his birthday and he had no power to stop time or Sherlock. He had already tried to fake being ill and that didn't work, because Sherlock was quite insistent that John wouldn't mind giving him a full medical examination. After that comment Anderson was miraculously better within seconds.

He had overheard a phone conversation that Sherlock was having with someone in the kitchen. He peaked through the door as he was talking to the unknown caller.

"I'm not doing it. I'll look stupid." Said the person on the phone.

"I'm not doing to deny that you will look stupid. But it is for Anderson and it's his birthday." Sherlock started typing something on the laptop "It costs five hundred pounds for it, and I will pay for it."

"I don't know still. Will it embarrass him?"

"Of course it will, I planned it." Sherlock smirked "If you do it I will give you twenty quid and you can have beer and cake."

"I'll do it, the cake better be good." After that the caller hung up, Sherlock closed the laptop and went out of the kitchen. Anderson pretended to text as Sherlock walked passed him.

"You know Anderson; you are not a good eavesdropper. Also your phone is off, so you can stop pretending to text. Nice try though." Sherlock commented.

"Who were you talking to?" Anderson questioned "What are you planning."

Sherlock chuckled "You will find out when the time is right." and with that he left and went upstairs. After Sherlock had went up the stairs, Anderson went into the Kitchen and went opened up the laptop. He searched through the history, there was nothing. Dam that Sherlock Holmes for deleting this history. Right now Anderson could crap his pants due to how terrified he was feeling.

During the weekend it was the grand event of his birthday. He was woken up by Sherlock poking his cheek aggressively with a wooden spoon. Anderson groaned and pulled the blanket over his head, hoping that it would be an invisibility cloak. After that Sherlock left the room muttering something under his breath. Anderson smirked and promptly went back to sleep. Minutes later both Sherlock and John went into the room and started to decorate the room and the person who was currently in the bed.

Once they had finished all the items in the room were covered in wrapping paper and were taken out of the room and placed in the kitchen, that was Sherlock's idea. The spinning chair had the screws removed from it and placed back together, honey was smeared on any possible surface and cameras were placed in the room. All of these were Sherlock's ideas, the only idea that John had was drawing on his face. After about ten minutes of arguing over text they had decided to go with the moustache and unibrow combo. Once they had finished decorating the room Sherlock carefully made his way to the side of the bed and started to badly play his violin so it sounded like a cat was getting the air squeezed out of it.

Anderson covered his ears from the screeching and pulled the pillow over his head "It is too early in the morning to be playing that bloody violin!"

Sherlock played the violin louder "It is never too early for music." Sherlock lifted up his bow as a signal to John, John nodded and threw the bucket of water down on the bed. Anderson made a noise that would be close resemblance to sound like nails on a chalk board as he fell out of the bed.

"What do you think you are playing at?" He shouted as he lifted up his hand to find out that it was covered in honey "Can't I just have one day where I don't wake up to the sound of the bloody violin in my ear?"

Sherlock and John looked at each other before bursting into laughter. Sherlock decided that the video that was being filmed was going on to the internet and he would let John blog about it. Then out of the count of three they both shouted "Happy Birthday!"

"Why are you pulling pranks on me?" Anderson moaned "Aren't you too old for doing that?"

"Mycroft and I would pull jokes on each other on our birthdays and I thought I could start the tradition here." Sherlock stated "Also you can never be too old for a bit of laughter in the morning."

"It is not funny. You have deafened me with your violin and soaked my bed. I expected better from you John. I thought you were fairly sensible."

John laughed and made his way out of the room. "When you live with Sherlock for a while you don't even know what sensible means in the dictionary. I'm making pancakes for breakfast."

Sherlock stood at the door for a moment and said with a smirk "You are going to have fun today. Your cards are on the table." Anderson nodded and Sherlock left the room, he waited in the hallway. Anderson went to the table and sat on the chair and started going through the cards. Within seconds the chair had collapsed and Anderson was on the floor. Sherlock could hear Anderson shout his name; he ran to the kitchen and hoped that John would protect him.

John was in the kitchen serving out the pancakes, he had shaped them into animals using moulds. Anderson stormed into the kitchen and sat down at the table and glared at the two men. So far this was the worst birthday ever and he couldn't wait for the day to end even though it was only half past six in the morning. John pushed a plate of elephant shaped pancakes towards him. Anderson shot him a questioning glare as he didn't trust either of the men as they had made his morning misery and they probably had poisoned his food.

"I haven't touched them Phil, honestly." John commented as he placed pancakes on his plate "Do cheer up, it is your birthday."

Sherlock thrust a small parcel to Anderson "It's time for presents." Anderson's face lit up as he started to tear open the parcel. His face dropped when he opened it. It was a door handle.

"Thank you, for the door handle I will make sure that I will keep it and cherish it." Before anyone else could speak Sherlock shoved a larger parcel into Anderson's hands. In this one was a wardrobe door. "Did you buy me Ikea furniture for my birthday?" he asked before realising that the wardrobe door was his "You took apart my furniture didn't you?" Sherlock and John just laughed again and Anderson wondered why he took these two idoits into his home.

The rest of the morning was spent unwrapping Anderson's belongings and putting them back together. Sherlock and John were forced to tidy up after themselves and put the furniture back together without instructions which ended up in disaster and Sherlock nearly falling out of a window.

Once the bedroom was reconstructed Sherlock dragged John and Anderson into a taxi and made the driver stop outside a restraint that had a large crowd of people waiting outside in a large line. Sherlock to the front of the door and strolled into the restaurant if he owned the place, people in the line complained about how the men got into the restaurant and why they couldn't get in even though they waited for hours. Anderson found the use for keeping Sherlock and John living with him –free food in a popular restaurant. Sherlock apparently stopped the restaurant from being closed after a murder had happened in the restaurant and the manager owed him. The manager quickly showed them to a table and passed them menus. People in the restaurant began to stare at Anderson's face.

"Why are they looking at me like that?" Anderson whispered.

"Maybe they think that you are the most beautiful man in the room." John commented with a snigger "You should wear that apron that says 'Hot stuff' on the front to let people know that."

Anderson rolled his eyes and scanned the menu. After a few minutes a waitress with spikey blonde hair and heels walked up to them and took their orders. She stared at Anderson's face for about a minute before saying "You have something on your face." Anderson grabbed a tray that a waiter left at the table and looked at his reflection. He had a ridicules moustache on his face and a unibrow that made Oscar the Grouch's look small. He tried to rub it off but it wasn't shifting. They must have used a permanent marker. Anderson stood up and was about to leave when John grabbed on to his sleeve and forced him to stay until they had at least had cake, he reluctantly decided to stay, as he had heard that the restaurant was really good and he was hoping that it lived up to his expectations.

Once their food was finished and they were waiting for the cake to be brought through Sherlock texted under the table for the final part of his plan to start. From the back of the restaurant someone wearing a large green dinosaur costume made his way into the table where the men were sitting. Anderson groaned and face palmed and said to Sherlock "I'm going to kill you." Sherlock just smiled and slipped a twenty pound note into the dinosaur's hand.

"It's someone's birthday today!" the Dinosaur shouted bringing the whole restaurant to focus their attention to the table. Anderson was now making threats of murder to Sherlock and John who encouraged the dinosaur to carry on. The Dinosaur went and stood on the stage and encouraged people to sing Happy birthday. Few people joined in and the rest started to post on their Facebook and Twitter about a singing dinosaur. As the Dinosaur sang he did a little dance as the song went on. Anderson was now tomato red and found himself being held onto the chair by Sherlock and John so he couldn't leave.

The Dinosaur called for the birthday boy to be brought forward so he could give him his present. Anderson sighed and thought the only way to get out of this situation was to play along with it. He slowly walked up to the Dinosaur as if he was being marched to his death and he was shoved on the dinosaur's lap. "Now what do you want for your birthday, young man?" The Dinosaur asked.

"New flat mates." Anderson replied without a minute of thought "And the ability to get away from murder."

"I don't think I can give you that." The Dinosaur chuckled "But your friend Sherlock has a present for you." A man playing piano pulled out a box and gave it to Anderson. Inside the box was a lizard who was currently staring at him. On the top of the enclosure it had the name 'The Anderlizard' in Sherlock's scratchy handwriting. Anderson smiled this was actually the best present he had ever gotten.

The Dinosaur pulled off his head and it was revealed to be Lestrade who was slightly pink from the heat from being in the costume. "Did he set you up to this?" Anderson asked, Greg nodded and wished him a happy birthday before getting out of the costume. Anderson walked back to the table where the cake was out on the table. It was a shape of a dinosaur and had the words of 'Have a rawwy happy birthday' on it. "Thank you so much for the present it is the best gift I have ever received."

"I hope that you forgive us for the jokes this morning and the dinosaur. It was all Sherlock's idea." John smiled

"I might forgive you but only if I get to do one thing."

"What is it?" Sherlock asked before his head was slammed down on the cake by Anderson. Sherlock slowly lifted up his face from the cake, cake was in his hair, spread around his clothes and his entire face. Anderson and John started to clench their sides with laughter as the detective came out of the cake. Sherlock removed a piece of cake and threw it at the two men. Soon enough the whole restaurant was in a food fight. The most dangerous person was an old woman with a fake hip who emptied her plate of pasta on John's head.

They ended up being banned from the restaurant.

As they walked through the streets of London as no taxi's would take them due to the amount of food on their clothes and the lizard, Anderson thought to himself that this was the best birthday that he ever had and hoped that his next one would be even better.

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Thank you for viewing and if you have any ideas please feel free to write them down and I might be able to use them.


	6. Bad smells

Disclaimer: Sherlock doesn't belong to me and all rights belong to the BBC.

I just want to say thank you for all the reviews, they make me feel so loved!

The smell was dreadful, it came from Sherlock's room and it had been getting stronger. The smells was so bad that it made John's eyes water as he walked past the room. The smell smelt of rotting food, damp and death. Both John and Anderson had tried to convince Sherlock to clean up his room to get rid of the smell but they were never successful as Sherlock would distract them. The most common ways that he had distracted them was by smashing something or by claiming that Lestrade had a 'case' for them, which ended up with John and Anderson sitting in a café while Sherlock would deduce people.

After two weeks the smell took over the whole flat and nothing could cover it up. Anderson had tried to cover it up with someone of his deodorant – that was for men thank you very much. It didn't work as it seemed to make the smell worse that it was before. It was only amount of time before the neighbours would start to complain about the smell. And it was a matter of time before the residents of the flat would have to wear gas masks full-time.

Sherlock was currently in his room doing something with the cause of the smell. The smell was already getting stronger as Sherlock rummaged around upstairs. John said that he was just moving furniture around and that he knocked over chemicals and that was the cause of the smell. Anderson knew that Sherlock had an experiment upstairs and was it was something dead and it was rotting. They would have to do something about the smell before it attracted maggots.

On the day they had decided to tackle the room, they had given Lestrade the task of taking Sherlock for the day to the morgue and to a crime scene that was at a theme park. Lestrade hoped that once they had finished that he could shove Sherlock on a rollercoaster mostly just as payback to see him suffer after pain that Sherlock would put him through. During a Yard day out to a theme park ,John had dragged Sherlock with him. Sherlock was complaining for the whole day and refused to go to any rides. John ended up shoving Sherlock onto a ride and all you could hear was Sherlock screaming and swearing, and the moment that Sherlock got off the ride he ended up vomiting on Anderson. After that day Sherlock vowed that he would never go to a theme park again.

Once Sherlock had left the flat, Anderson and John dressed on bright yellow protective suits with gas masks and goggles on and went into the room. Sherlock's room was absolutely spotless and nothing was out of place. Nothing looked like it would have caused a bad smell. Did they imagine the smell? Anderson threw his goggles on the bed and something fell out. The object fell out with a large bang. Anderson went to the side of the bed and called over John who went pale. The object was wrapped in bandages and was smelling dreadful.

Anderson and John began to unwrapping the bandages slowly preparing themselves for what was beneath. After every layer of bandages the smell got worse and worse. It wasn't until they got to five layers deep they found the cause of the smell.

It was a dead sheep. A dead sheep that was rotting maggots slowly crawled around the animals face. Sherlock had kept a dead sheep in his bed. Sherlock was the most disgusting person that Anderson had ever met.

"What was he doing with a dead sheep in his bed?" John asked as he thought down the urge to be sick.

"How am I supposed to know?" Anderson shouted "It looks like he was trying to mummify it, like what the Egyptians did with the dead."

John paled "Oh crap." He shouted "I can't believe that I let him keep a dead sheep in his bedroom. No wonder he has spent all that time in his room. He was preserving a sheep."

"I can believe that I let him stay in my flat. The moment he comes home he is moving out. He is living with his brother for all I care!"

"You wouldn't do that. I think you quite like having him live with you, despite how much you say how you want a new flat mate. He quite likes living here with you as well, you know." John stated.

"He actually likes living here?" Anderson said in a surprised tone "I though he hated me."

"Sherlock wouldn't go through that effort to embarrass you on your birthday if he didn't like you. If he hated you, you would be dead." John explained "And you didn't know how long it took for him to get Anderlizard for you."

Anderson didn't say anything as mostly he didn't know how to respond, did Sherlock Holmes actually liked him as a human being? He would ask him about it later. Instead of asking anymore questions Anderson checked the sheep's stomach there was a large cut that was badly stitched up as if the person was in a hurry. "He has taken out the organs. They will be somewhere in his room, as he never throws anything out. Look for any containers or jars." Anderson instructed "I'm going to check the fridge and the freezer , just to make sure."

Anderson checked the fridge and the freezer, there was nothing in there apart from a tub of live insects that were for Anderlizard. And at the bottom shelf of the freezer was the head that was in the fridge, didn't he throw it out weeks ago?

A shout from John sent him upstairs. On the bedside table there was several containers and jars labelled with names of organs. "You found them, that is brilliant, John."

"That is not the only thing I found." John said before pulling out a dress from the back of the wardrobe. The dress was a long black number that was low-cut and was padded at the front. "I just found it in here when I was looking for containers." John explained "I think it is Sherlock's, as he has never brought a woman into the flat in the time I have lived with him."

The two men had the same question running through their heads : Why did Sherlock Holmes have a dress in his wardrobe? They knew that they would have to ask him when he came back to the flat. Once they had disposed all the organs and the sheep and waited for Sherlock to return, so he can tell them about the dress. Sherlock came back to the flat at around seven and was greeted by John and Anderson sitting at one side of the dining table. "Sherlock, please sit down." John said as he pointed to a chair that was on the other side of the table.

Sherlock slowly sat down and gave a confused look at both of the men "What is going on?"

John looked at Anderson and urged him to start "We cleaned out your room and we found something."

Sherlock sighed "You found the sheep didn't you?" John nodded "That was my experiment. I have spent weeks trying to preserve that sheep."

"What experiment requires you to preserve a sheep?" John asked "And couldn't you have done it somewhere else like the morgue? I am sure Molly would let you keep your sheep."

"Don't you think that I already tried asking her? You must think I am an Idiot." Sherlock said sounding expatriated "Molly said that it was against 'health and safety' and I couldn't do my experiment on how long it takes to mummify a sheep using the same techniques as the ancient Egyptians. And before you ask I tried to do the experiment at Mycroft's house but he nearly got me arrested for 'breaking and entering." Turns out he does not like me going into his house in the middle of the night to dissect a sheep in his kitchen."

"Not many people do like dead sheep being in their home." Anderson commented "Also before we go to my next point. Sherlock if you try and mummify anything in my flat, you will be moving out and living with Mycroft." Anderson threatened knowing that Sherlock would do anything other than live with his brother.

Sherlock rolled his eyes and sighed as if he was being forced to go a great task "Fine."

"And now that we are done with that." Said John "When we were in your room we found a dress in your wardrobe. Is there any reason you have a dress, we won't judge you for it." Sherlock went bright pink and stormed off to his room.

"I guess we will need to find out another time then." Anderson said sounding disappointed "I was really wanting to know."

"Why do you think he has a dress?" John asked "I still think it is from a women he brought to the flat." John pulled out his wallet and examined the contents of it "I bet you ten pound that it is the reason for him having a dress."

Anderson grinned "I think he has the dress is because he is a drag queen. He looks like the flamboyant type."

The rest of the night consisted of Anderson and John arguing over the reason Sherlock would have a dress. Sherlock spent the rest of the night upstairs thinking of a place he could hide the dress without no one finding it again.

Thank you for reviewing and if you have ideas I would love to read them and I might be able to use them for a new chapter.


	7. Anderson's date

Disclaimer : Sherlock doesn't belong to me and all rights belong to the BBC

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Anderson had a date that night to everyone's surprise. Katie was the new receptionist at the Yard and somehow managed to be convinced to go on a date with Anderson. Sherlock didn't know why anyone would want to go on a date with Anderson, but then again Katie wasn't the brightest crayon in the box and she didn't realise how unpleasant Anderson was. Sherlock was in a bit of a mood with Anderson again as he found out about the exploding tumble dryer and the fingers in the washing machine. The brand new towels were never the same after that spin cycle. Worst of all Anderson was still removing bits of finger nail from his clothes for weeks.

Sherlock was bored he was shooting the wall with John's gun targeting a smiley face he had drawn on the wall. "Bored. Bored . Bored." Sherlock said after every gun shot. He had no cases for two days and was already going crazy for the lack of mental stimulation. Anderson heard the gun shots and ran into the living room covering his ears, Sherlock turned around and saw Anderson "Bored." He shouted before shooting the gun again.

"Give me the gun Sherlock!" Anderson shouted before trying to snatch the gun away from the detective. Sherlock held the gun above his head and smirked. Anderson sighed he couldn't believe that his flatmate was in his thirty's and still acted like a child. Sherlock probably followed the expression you are as old as you feel, Anderson thought. "Sherlock, you don't give me the gun, I will tell Mycroft that you want to spend the rest of the year at his house." Sherlock sighed overdramatically, passed the gun to Anderson and flopped on the sofa. Anderson automatically removed the cartridge from the gun and shoved into his shirt pocket. "I know that you are bored, but you don't take it out on the wall." Anderson hissed "I have neighbours, and they complain already."

Sherlock sighed "Who care what the neighbours think? They have enough problems in their lives and they are far more interesting than our lives. The man upstairs is having an affair with man while he still lives with his wife. He brings the gentleman caller to the flat when she is not there. The old woman downstairs cat has just been ran over by a bike and she is experiencing some grief."

"You cause everybody around you grief." Anderson mumbled "And you are right about everything apart from the man upstairs." Anderson smirked "The woman he lives with is his sister and the gentleman caller is his boyfriend."

"How do you know that?" Sherlock asked, he wanted to know how Anderson managed to know something that he didn't know. And that was surprising as Anderson was an idiot.

"It's called talking to the neighbours, you should try it sometime. When you talk to people they tend to tell you things that you didn't know about them."

Sherlock rolled his eyes "Why would I want to do that, it's boring." Sherlock stood up and paced the room "You are wearing men's deodorant for a change and you have a higher cotton count in your shirt what is the occasion?"

"I have a date tonight." Sherlock scoffed at Anderson's comment "She does exist! You know Katie the new receptionist?"

"Is she the one that wears too much perfume and has bleaches her teeth?"

"How do you know about the teeth?" Anderson asked he thought that Katie's teeth looked natural and she just took good care of them.

"It's called talking to the staff, you should try it sometime, when you talk to people they tend to tell you things that you didn't know about them." Sherlock mocked "Where are you taking her?"

"Restaurant." Anderson stated "Why the sudden interest in what I am doing?"

"I am bored out of my skull, Anderson. I haven't had a case in two days and you are the only remotely interesting thing in the flat."

"Go and annoy someone else. I'm leaving." Anderson said as he searched for the keys and his wallet.

"I can't annoy anyone else, John is visiting Harry, Lestrade is on holiday, Molly is ill, and I would rather cut off my arm that visit my brother. So that only leaves you." Sherlock stood up and with a dramatic swish of his dressing gown he left the room. Anderson quickly rummaged through the flat for the keys and the wallet, this was his only chance to escape before Sherlock would come back. He couldn't find them as someone had moved them. This had Sherlock's name written all over it.

Sherlock came back minutes later dressed up in his normal clothes. "So when are we going?" He asked as he unplugged his phone from the wall.

"What makes you think that you are going?" Anderson asked "And give me my keys."

"I have nothing better to do and John told me that a date is when two people who like each other go out and have fun together. Do you not want us to have fun tonight?"

"I want to have fun tonight but not with you. And give me my keys."

Sherlock held the keys by the chain and jingled them "You can have them if you let me go with you. Also if you don't let me go I will go into your bedroom again and do a search with a black light again on those magazines and your laptop. I'm sure that Lestrade will love to know about your internet history."

Anderson checked his watch he was meeting Katie in less than half an hour and he was really needing to leave now before the traffic got bad. "Fine." He sighed "You can go only if you promise to stay quiet and not say anything bad about me and you delete any conversation that is mentioned."

"But that is not fun." Sherlock complained but still decided to go along with Anderson anyway. The cab ride consisted of Anderson lecturing Sherlock on what not to do during the night. Sherlock played a childish game on his phone as he would rather play that instead of listening to Anderson drone on. Once the cab ride had stopped outside the restaurant the two men waited outside for a few minutes before Katie wobbled in with her too high shoes, short skirt and her very white teeth.

"Sorry I'm late traffic was busy." She said flashing her teeth.

"It's fine, we have just arrived here as well." Anderson commented before opening the door for Katie.

"We have not just arrived here, Anderson. We have been here for four and a half minutes." Sherlock complained. He wondered if Anderson could actually tell the time, there was a difference between just arriving and being somewhere for four and a half minutes.

Katie put on a fake smile "I don't want to upset you Phil, but I am not really into threesomes."

Sherlock gave a confused look as he had no clue what that was he would need to ask John or Google about that. "No, no , no." Anderson said quickly "He is my flat mate. He is just with me tonight as I don't trust him home alone. He is special." Anderson mentally slapped himself that was a lame excuse, but it was true, he hadn't met anyone else like Sherlock Holmes.

"I am a genius. Get your facts right." Sherlock stated "Who's Phil?"

"That's Phil." Katie said as she pointed to Anderson with a bright red painted talon "You don't know your own flatmates name?"

"Who names their child Philip? It's a horrible name." Sherlock shouted

"My mother did, Sherlock. Philip is a better name than Sherlock." Anderson complained.

"Philip is the name you would call an idiot, but it is fitting because you are one. You should have checked the washing machine before you put those towels in there."

"Well I wasn't expecting fingers to be in my washing machine. I have told you at least a million times that I don't want experiments in my home!" Unknown to Anderson was that Katie was already on her second glass of wine and was muttering about how Sherlock and Anderson should go to couples counselling. Anderson turned his attention to Katie "I'm sorry about that. Are you ready to order? I'm going to have the steak." He said changing the subject.

"You don't want to eat anything with meat in it Katie you have gained three" Sherlock was cut off with Anderson shoving a glass of wine in his hand. Sherlock took a drink from it, it was expensive, and since Anderson was paying for the night he thought that he would enjoy the night.

It had a been an hour since the date had started apart from the occasional quip he had spent the night drinking wine and now he was feeling slightly tipsy but it could be that he had a bottle and a half of wine. Anderson and Katie seemed to be getting along well and now they were asking each other silly questions. "So," Katie giggled "What is your favourite animal?" Before Anderson could open his mouth, Sherlock answered for him.

"Dinosaurs!" he shouted to the restaurant "He loves dinosaurs. You love dinosaurs don't you Philip?" Anderson hit his head off the table instantly regretting the idea of giving Sherlock wine to keep him quiet. "Don't you think Philip is a funny name? Does anyone else think the name Philip is a funny name, hands up, if you think it is a funny name." One old man put up his hand and the rest of his family encouraged him to put it down. "Keep your hand up good sir!" Sherlock slurred as he stumbled slightly as he walked to the old man "You are beautiful for agreeing with me." Sherlock stroked the old man's face "I could do with another beautiful person in my crime solving team. We are called the Holmes Squad, and I want you to join me and we can fight crime together." Sherlock took the man's glass of wine and drank it "If you don't want to join the Holmes Squad, my friend, you could join the Andersarus Dino Gang, it is not as cool as my team though."

The old man looked to give him an answer for joining a gang but the shouts of "Granddad no!" was his answer spoken for him by his granddaughter. Sherlock walked away with another glass of wine he had stolen from another table.

Sherlock stumbled his way back to Anderson and threw his arm around Anderson's shoulders "I don't tell you this enough Phil but I love you." He slurred.

Anderson removed Sherlock's arm from himself "You have drunk too much wine and I think that you should go home." Anderson was about to apologised to Katie for his Flatmate's behaviour but she had already.

"I don't want to go home." Sherlock complained as he stamped his feet "I have all my friends in here and I can't leave them. And its karaoke tonight. Did you know that Karaoke means empty orchestra in Japanese?"

"We are going home Sherlock." Anderson said as he pulled out his wallet and fished out a few notes and slammed them on the table "And you are not doing…" It was too late as Sherlock was on the stage ruining 'I will always love you'. Anderson marched towards the stage and started to drag Sherlock away.

"I can sing another song if you want. What about the sound track from the Lion King you love that movie. We can do a duet, your choice what do you say?" Anderson said nothing and opened up the door to shove Sherlock through it. "Help he is kidnapping me. Stranger! Stranger." He shouted "He is going to take me home and experiment on me, and he will make me have his dinobabies. He has seen Jurassic Park a million times, he knows what to do." Sherlock removed himself from Anderson's grasp and made his way back to the stage. "If I don't make it tonight, just remember this is how I looked like before I died." After that Sherlock fell off the stage and face first into a cake that was for someone's birthday.

After falling into the cake , they were banned from the restaurant and they had to walk home as no taxi would take a completely hammered Sherlock. The police nearly arrested them twice before they got to the flat. The moment they had got to the flat Sherlock had collapsed on the floor and instantly fell asleep even though he was covered in cake and trouser less as he decided to give his trousers away to a park bench, Anderson tried to get him to move but Sherlock was like a log and had refused to move. Anderson grabbed a blanket and pillow from the sofa and placed them on Sherlock so he would be more comfortable, he went into the kitchen and checked the draws for aspirin having a feeling that he would need it for tomorrow. He placed a bowl from the kitchen by Sherlock, if he didn't make it to the bathroom. Anderson wondered why he was being so nice to the man who ruined his date and embarrassed him in front of at least hundred people. But then again Sherlock had embarrassed himself quite a bit. Anderson logged on to his computer and found that on YouTube was a video called 'Drunk Detective sings Whitney Houston' and multiple other videos that featured a drunk Sherlock. Anderson smirked knowing that he actually had blackmail against Sherlock.

The next morning Sherlock found himself on the floor and was missing his trousers. His head was killing him and the lights were too bright. He slowly walked to the Kitchen where Anderson was making breakfast. "Anderson, where are my trousers?" He asked in a quiet voice.

"Well those are in a park, you though you give them to a bench as you thought it looked cold." Anderson smirked.

Sherlock slowly sat down and placed his head in his hands "What happened last night?"

Anderson shoved a greasy fry up in front of Sherlock and gave a fake smile "What do you remember from last night?"

Sherlock pushed the plate away from himself and it make Anderson snort "I had a glass of wine and that's all I can remember from last night."

"You had more than a glass of wine." Anderson said before playing the videos of Sherlock being drunk. Sherlock watched in horror as the memories from the night flooded his mind. Once the video's had finished Anderson pulled out his phone. "And this is the best part of the night." His phone rang and the ringtone was Sherlock singing 'I will always love you.' "I'm keeping that ringtone until you sing something better. I recommend that you don't quit being a consulting detective as you aren't a good singer. Come to think of it the best bit of the night was between you singing, you falling into the cake or you kissing the police officer. He was very generous about not getting you arrested." Anderson smirked "Anything to say for yourself?"

After a moment Sherlock said "I'm never drinking again."

It was too months later a new selection of videos were posted online of Sherlock getting drunk at the staff member's leaving party with spiked punch.

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Thank you so much for reading. This chapter was so much fun to write and I hope you enjoyed it. If you have an idea please feel free to write it down and I might use it in a future chapter.


	8. Toby

Disclaimer: Sherlock does not belong to me and all rights belong to the BBC.

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Sherlock stormed back into the flat after a bad day in the morgue, someone had moved his riding crop again and he couldn't beat any courses again. And the worst bit of the day was that Molly had accidentally spilt a cup of blood on his jacket and had reined it. Sherlock knew that the jacket was going to be ruined and it wasn't even worth going to the dry cleaner to fix it, mostly as he was banned from almost all the dry cleaners in all of London. Turns out that they all know each other and they like to share stories about their clients. Really it wasn't Sherlock's fault that he blew up the washing machines; he accidentally forgot to remove the chemical that was also the same one that blew up the flat from his pocket. Now all Sherlock wanted to do was use John's laptop and troll science chat rooms that he wasn't banned from yet.

He opened the door and a small child ran out who was screaming "Don't eat me Mr Dinosaur!" Sherlock looked at the ground and saw that it was Anderlizard that was apparently 'chasing' the child. Anderlizard looked at Sherlock before blinking as a greeting. The child hid behind Sherlock and tucked his self in his coat. Sherlock shoved the child in front of him so he didn't get his clothes dirty from sticky fingers.

"That is a lizard and it is not a dinosaur." Sherlock corrected, this was the absolute reason that he hated children: they were wrong about almost everything and they tended to over exaggerate everything. And worst of all Sherlock thought that they smelt funny. "Where do you come from?" he asked wondering how he managed to create a life form without knowing it, was the child from his experiment with baking?

"Toby, I have told you to stay in the flat." Anderson said as found the boy and gently pushed him into the flat "You don't know what strange people you are going to meet like… Sherlock." Anderson said as he turned around and saw the confused detective. Sherlock shoved past Anderson and went to the table to his experiment. It was gone. All of his hard work –really only five minutes of it was gone.

"Anderson!" Sherlock barked "Where is my experiment!"

Anderson changed the TV to a kids program and managed to get Toby to sit down. He walked over to the kitchen where Sherlock was opening and closing the cupboards quickly. Sherlock found that the cupboard where he kept his chemicals was locked with a padlock and wasn't budging no matter how much he tried to struggle it open. "Sherlock you can get your experiment back when Toby goes home. I had to lock them up in case he got to them." Anderson explained calmly.

Sherlock let out a low growl before pinning Anderson to the wall and put his face close to Anderson's. "You don't touch the experiments." Sherlock hissed "I don't care that there is a small child in here but I will kill you if you touch them again."

Toby heard the noise and walked into the kitchen to see his uncle being pressed up against the wall he asked "Uncle Philip, what is that man doing to you." Toby loved his uncle Philip as he would play dinosaurs with him and let him eat sweets and he was rather confused to why someone would hold his favourite uncle against a wall.

Anderson saw his nephew's reaction and tried to not alarm him "Well Toby, that man is… that man is." He struggled to make something up that was believable as he couldn't say 'That man is going to kill me' as that would put the child through years of therapy. "That man is hugging me." He said after a few moments and he uncomfortably hugged the detective who stood there awkwardly until Anderson threatened to show the Yard his drunken video. The detective reached his arms around and patted Anderson's shoulder. Never mind being absolutely hammered at the restaurant this was Sherlock's most embarrassing moment.

Toby looked happy that his uncle wasn't being murdered before asking "Are you two boyfriends?" Both Anderson and Sherlock went pink and both started to deny any claims that they were together.

"No, no, no." Anderson said quickly "I don't have a boyfriend and he is definitely not my boyfriend. By the way he is not my type. Anyway that man has a boyfriend."

"John is not my boyfriend." Sherlock sent a glare towards Anderson "And if you need to know we just live together and that is it."

" Uncle Philip, mummy said that you lived with two men and they were both of your boyfriends and you complain about them a lot and you haven't brought a woman home for dinner in a long time and when you did it was that man." Said Toby "Can we have spaghetti for tea?"

"I think I will be having a bit of a chat with your mummy soon." Anderson sighed "And yes we can have spaghetti." Anderson thought that Toby was a lovely boy and he loved him to pieces but like most children he tended to believe everything his mother said and he would bring it up in uncomfortable situations. "Toby do you want to watch cartoons while I talk to Sherlock for a minute and then we can play dinosaurs again." Toby ran back into the living room and jumped onto the sofa with his stuffed dinosaur that Anderson had bought him for his birthday.

"Anderson, your nephew is just like you in the fact that you both have a lack of brains." Sherlock growled as he saw that Toby was poking the skull in its eye hole. "I don't know how you can put up with a child, he touches everything, and he says stupid things."

"I know what it is like to live with a child." Anderson mumbled "And don't call my nephew an idiot!"

"He is not very clever then, if he thinks that we are boyfriends and that your lizard is a dinosaur."

"He is six years old!" Anderson shouted "He doesn't know everything, he has an active imagination but that doesn't mean that he is in idiot."

"When I was six years old I knew all the bones in the human body and I knew about advanced physics." Sherlock boasted.

"And here you are at thirty five and you don't know that the earth goes round the sun." Anderson smirked

"It's not important. There are more important things in the world other than astronomy ."

"My nephew can tell you all the planets and the how the earth goes around the sun and he knows who the prime minister is."

"Who cares about the prime minister? They are just going to get a new person to be prime minister in a few years." Sherlock rolled his eyes Anderson was an idiot thinking that his nephew was a genius for knowing who the prime minister was. Before he could let Anderson speak he asked "Why is your nephew here? You didn't consult me that you were bringing a child here."

Anderson sighed before checking the cupboard "I didn't plan for Toby to be here today. His parent's had an emergency and they didn't have enough time to arrange childcare. So they left him here."

"What emergency would that be?" Sherlock asked

"His mother's uncle had a heart attack."

"They could of left him at home, instead of leaving him here."

"Do I need to repeat it?" Anderson closed the cupboard and grabbed his jacket "He is six years old, he never stops moving and he would burn down the house."

"I never would do that if I was left home alone."

"No you don't burn down houses, you blow up your flat instead. I'm going to the shop, watch over Toby and play dinosaurs with him." Anderson grabbed his wallet and was about to leave when Sherlock stopped him.

"You are not leaving me with that child." Sherlock growled.

"Well, I don't see you rushing out to go to the shop. And you can't go to the shop as you are banned from Tesco." Anderson smirked "Toby won't be much of a hassle and if you play dinosaurs with him he will be happy."

Sherlock stamped his foot "I don't want to play dinosaurs, I want to do my experiment."

"Sherlock Holmes, just be a bloody dinosaur!" Anderson shouted before he slammed the door and left.

As on queue Toby ran into the kitchen and folded his arms "Before we can play dinosaurs, I want to know why are you mean to my uncle Philip?"

"Because he is an absolute arse that's why."

Toby covered his ears with his hands after Sherlock said the word 'arse'. "You aren't allowed to say that word, that is a bad word."

"I live here and I am allowed to say any word I want. Also I am the adult and I am allowed to say it."

"But it is a bad word and they can hurt people's feelings."

"I don't care about feelings and I can say that word as I am smarter than you."

"Uncle Philip says that you don't know about the solar system. I know about the solar system. Do you want me to list of all the planets?" Toby asked.

"No I do not. The solar system is for idiots and you are an idiot for filling your brain up with useless things." Toby's lip began to wobble and seconds after that he burst into tears. Sherlock stood there wondering what to do as he wasn't good with children or really people in general.

The front door opened and Sherlock's saviour John came back from work. "I'm back, what is going on?" he asked as he found a crying child and Sherlock who had his hands clamped over his ears. John looked at the child crying and he knew that this had Sherlock's name written all over it. "Sherlock, what did you do?"

"Toby asked me why I didn't like Anderson and I told him the truth. Toby then claimed that arse was a bad word and we got in an argument over that. And that led onto the solar system and I told him that he was an idiot for filling his brain up with useless things." Sherlock explained. John shook his head Sherlock was the only person he knew that could end up having an argument with a small child over the solar system.

"You don't call children idiots. You don't like it if you get called an idiot." John said before going up to the small boy. "Are you okay mate?" John asked in his 'nice doctor' voice that he used for when he had to give children injections so he didn't frighten them. "I heard that Sherlock called you a mean name, it wasn't very nice was it?" Toby just shook his head before latching onto John's leg " I know that you are not an idiot, as your uncle keeps telling me how you talk to him about the solar system and dinosaurs all the time. You are a very clever boy."

"The man said a bad word and used it to say something about uncle Philip. And I told him that it wasn't nice but he said that he is clever so he gets to use it." Toby sniffed.

"We don't use bad words in this flat ." John said loudly so that Sherlock would hear "And they are not nice so we don't use them. I take it that your mummy doesn't like bad words in her house either. My mummy would make someone sit on the naughty step if they said a bad word. Do you think we should put Sherlock on the naughty step for saying a bad word and calling you a bad name?" Toby nodded and went up to Sherlock dragging John with him.

"You have been very naughty and I think you need to go on the naughty step." Toby said crossing his arms.

Sherlock looked at John and John looked at Sherlock before nodding.

"I am not going onto the naughty step, I refuse." Sherlock protested.

"Sherlock , just go on the naughty step before I remove one of your privileges." John threatened.

Sherlock sighed and went onto the step. It looks like John had been watching the Supernanny again. That show had always put ideas in John's head on how he could improve Sherlock's behaviour. "How long do I need to be on the step?" Sherlock asked hoping that John wouldn't go with that minute per year of age as he would be on the step for thirty-five minutes.

"Ten minutes." John decided after a few minutes "Give me your phone." John commanded, Sherlock sighed and reluctantly handed over his phone. This was going to be a long ten minutes.

"Do you want to play dinosaurs with me?" Toby asked hopefully. John nodded and they both ran up into the living room. Sherlock could hear them running around and growling at each other. Toby would occasionally threaten to 'eat' John and John would pretend to beg for his life. Sherlock sighed at how they could be having fun at a stupid game.

After ten minutes the timer went off and both Toby and John came to the naughty step. "You have done ten minutes, do you know what you have done wrong?" John asked.

Sherlock sighed "It is not nice to say bad words and it's not nice to call people idiots."

John nodded "Good. Now don't you have something to say?"

"I am sorry Toby for calling you an idiot and saying a bad word about your uncle."

"That is good Sherlock." John congratulated "Now hug and make up with each other."

Toby launched himself into Sherlock's lap and hugged him "I am not upset with you any more as you said that you were sorry. Now we can play dinosaurs."

Toby dragged Sherlock and John to the living room again and climbed on Sherlock's back. "Let's go and eat that little stegosaurus!" Toby shouted before Sherlock started to chase after John who was squealing like a little girl as he ran away from Sherlock and Toby.

By the time Anderson had come home from the shop he noticed that the flat was quieter than normal. He went into the living room and saw that there were three figures crammed together on the sofa. John at one end of the sofa with Sherlock's feet in his lap. Sherlock was at the other side of the sofa with Toby who had jammed himself right into Sherlock with his head on Sherlock's chest. The only sound Anderson could hear was John snoring. Anderson couldn't help but smile at the scene that was taking place he pulled out his phone and took several pictures and sent one to Toby's parent's, Mrs Hudson, Mycroft and Lestrade. He had a feeling that they wouldn't believe him if he told them about this without any photographic evidence. It looked if the Andersaurus Dino Gang was cooler that the Holmes Squad for once as the flat was still in one piece and Toby was not running and jumping about and causing trouble. He eventually dragged himself to the kitchen and started to prepare dinner. It was a shame that Toby wasn't around every day it was rather nice to have a quiet flat.

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Thank you for reading and if you have an idea please write them down as I have no idea what to write about now. I will use all ideas given to me.


	9. The Rubber Duck Incident

Disclaimer: I don't own Sherlock and all rights belong to the BBC.

I'm sorry for the delay, I have been so busy with exams that I haven't had the time to write. But I am finished with my exams , yay!

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"Did you know that my dear brother wanted to be a pirate when he was younger?" Mycroft said after a sip of tea "He could of easily have settled for being a scientist or philosopher, but all he wanted to be was a pirate. It wasn't until he was sixteen and going to university he found out that he couldn't be a pirate as they had no courses for that career path."

Anderson and John sniggered, it was quite easy for them to imagine Sherlock in a pirate costume. John thought that it must have been that Sherlock's coat did look like one a pirate would wear, and he just needed a hat and an eye patch to complete the look. Anderson thought that Sherlock would want to end up being a scientist like Frankenstein and creating a monster, but then Sherlock did that almost every time he was in the kitchen.

"Unlike you Mycroft, I did grow up. I have a proper job, I don't sit around all day bossing people about while wearing a suit." Sherlock commented with a smirk.

"No, you do that all the time as well but you don't always wear clothes sometimes it is just a sheet." John remarked as he reached over and picked up another biscuit and offered the rest around.

"You go about the flat in just a sheet?" Anderson asked, this was news to him as all the time he had seen Sherlock in the flat he was fully clothed. "Please don't tell me you have been on the furniture as I will need to get the sofa cleaned again after the ice cream experiment."

"I have sat on the couch." Sherlock smirked "Sometimes the sheet slips and my bare skin touches the cushions."

Anderson quickly moved off the sofa and squealed "That is absolutely disgusting. I keep my lizard in this room, you are an evil man for making my lizard see you in a sheet and he is going to need therapy. Can't you wear clothes like a normal person? I don't exactly go around the flat naked and sit on your chair or your bed.

"I could do on an experiment on that, feel free to do that. I could see how much bacteria is on a chair after a naked man has sat on it. It will be fascinating." Sherlock encouraged "We will start the experiment this evening. John you may do this as well."

"I am not doing that." John protested "I am willing to do any experiment that you want, but I am not walking around the flat naked. I am not gay and I don't want you to see my down stairs area."

"John, you are a doctor nudity shouldn't phase you."

"It only phases me when it is me naked or anyone in the flat. I do not wish to see anyone of you naked as I wish to retain the power of sight."

Mycroft chucked to himself "You three are so amusing. This reminds me of the time Sherlock refused to go to Buckingham Palace in his clothes and he just wore a sheet. He almost walked away from his sheet. Philip has he told you the story?"

"I believe that he hasn't. But I would love to hear the story, it sounds interesting." Anderson smirked.

"John, have I told you the story of Mycroft's rubber duck incident? It is a rather interesting story." Sherlock asked.

"I would love to hear the story." John commented, it wasn't every day that you got something to blackmail the 'British Government'.

It was during the summer right before Mycroft went to university. Sherlock was twelve years old and was bored most of the time as Mycroft wouldn't play with him as he claimed that he was 'Too busy to play games.' Sherlock slowly walked along the halls of the house stopping occasionally to peel back some of the floorboard to find the mouse might of slipped out of its cadge when accidentally left the door open when Mummy had called him away to talk about the reason why there was a worm in Mycroft's cake.

Sherlock stopped walking where he had heard singing from the bathroom. No one else was in the house apart from Mycroft. So it must have been Mycroft singing, he was singing that song he really liked by this band called 'Journey.' Mycroft was not a bad singer, but he wasn't that good as he didn't seem to get the high notes.

Sherlock sniggered as he heard Mycroft go into the chorus. There weren't many things that Sherlock found funny , but his brother singing was currently the funniest thing in this life. Sherlock quickly dashed into his room and pulled out his tape recorder that he got for his birthday and he pressed record button.

Once the tape had run out, Mycroft was still singing. This time it was a song from that film that Mummy would make him watch that had the lion, scarecrow and witch that wanted a pair of shoes. Sherlock never understood that film as why did the girl want to go back home after being in the magical land, he thought it might be called the land of Ooze.

Sherlock creaked the door open slightly and saw Mycroft in the bathtub singing into a rubber duck as if it was a microphone. Didn't people usually sing in the shower, not the bathtub? Sherlock thought as he turned his face away from his brother. It felt strange for Sherlock to watch his brother singing in a rubber duck in the bathtub mostly as his brother was naked. Sherlock felt a sneeze start to build up. He tried to do all those things that books have told him to prevent a sneeze. He tried pinching his nose, that didn't work. He tried pressing his tongue against the roof of his mouth, that didn't work. He tried to think of something obscure, that didn't work mostly as he couldn't think of something that obscure.

"Somewhere oovvvver the rainboooooooooooow." Mycroft sang loudly in a high voice that somewhat resembled an opera singer. Just as Mycroft finished the long note, Sherlock had sneezed. It wasn't a quiet little one that he usually had, it was the opposite. It was a loud sneeze that was actually one that consisted of a few big sneezes. After the first loud sneeze he stopped signing. Mycroft noticed the gap in the door, he was sure that he shut the door completely. Another sneeze, he noticed the noises from the sneezes were close. Mycroft squinted slightly and he managed to get a glimpse of his brother holding a tape recorder. Mycroft grabbed his towel and left the bathroom with the rubber duck in his hand. "You little brat!" Mycroft shouted "Give me the tape recorder." Sherlock noticed that his brother was slightly angry at him and started to run away from his brother who was wet and naked apart from the towel he was holding at his waist with a clenched fist.

Sherlock ran down the stairs with Mycroft not far behind him. Despite being quite chubby Mycroft was a surprisingly fast runner, Sherlock reckoned if Mycroft wanted he could join an athletics team and loose that extra weight, but it would never happen as Mycroft was rather fond of Mummy's cakes. Mycroft did eat most of Cousin Matilda's wedding cake and he blamed it on Uncle Vincent's dog. Sherlock heard voices from the parlour, the voices were quite nasally and squeaky at the same time if that was humanly possible. It must have been Mummy and her friends in their monthly 'get together' where they would drink wine and complain about clothes and the stock market. Every time they would meet up they would have to have a picture to capture the memory of them being together as they didn't see each other for weeks, and they need the remainder of what each other looked like and who was at each gathering each month. The women were at every gathering, no one new entered or left, apart from Miss Plimpton who had drank too much champagne and tried to get into bed with Mycroft , but that was another story.

Sherlock felt something hit off the back off his head and it went flying forward. Sherlock looked at the ground and saw the rubber duck which was lying by the large cake Mummy insisted to have at every get together. Mycroft had thrown a rubber duck at him, it was actually the most normal thing Mycroft had thrown at him. In the past Mycroft had thrown: Videos, microscopes, shoes, an umbrella, a dead goldfish and for some reason a pineapple at him.

Mummy and her friends got ready to take a picture in front of the large cake. Sherlock ran past Mummy and brushed past her legs making her stubble in her high heels slightly. "Do be careful Sherlock, this is a new skirt I have on. I nearly went into the cake!" Mummy squealed as he friends laughed. Sherlock muttered an apology before hiding in the kitchen.

Sherlock heard a large thud and some screams from the living room. Sherlock knew that he couldn't be the cause of them, mostly as he only touched Mummy as he ran past. He peaked his head through the door and found that the cake was all over the floor and Mummy and her friends had cake in their hair. Mycroft was covered in cake and was collapsed on the tray where the cake was. Mycroft quickly stood up and apologise, Mummy screamed and pointed at Mycroft. Mycroft he was curious why his mother was screaming and pointing at him.

"Mummy, I am not that fat and pointing and screaming at me won't help my self-esteem." He commented before looking down and realising that his towel was on the other side of the room. Mycroft quickly tried to hide himself from everyone else, but mostly it was so he could keep the little amount remaining dignity he had left. A bright light and a clicking sound brought his attention. He noticed that Sherlock was behind the camera and was cackling like an old hag.

The door opened and father came in from work. Father took a look around the room and assessed the situation. It was dreadful and he had seen cleaner stag nights compared to the mess his living room was in. Sherlock noticed his Father's turn bright red; it was something that happened before he shouted. With an almighty roar he shouted "Mycroft Holmes, put on some trousers on at once!" Mycroft grabbed his towel and ran upstairs wondering why fate had made him related to his brother as he was the one who caused all this and Mycroft was just the victim as always.

"So what happened to Mycroft after he got shouted at?" John asked after managing to calm down slightly.

Sherlock gave a low chuckle "Mummy didn't have any more 'get togethers' as she was so embarrassed about what happened. Mycroft was grounded for the rest of the summer and he was almost forced to go to Oxford University."

"What is wrong with Oxford University?" Anderson asked, he thought that Oxford was a great university and he had sent in an application form when he was choosing a university to go to.

"Well compared to the university I went to any other university is a dump." Mycroft chuckled as he tried to recover from the story Sherlock told, he could still feel the redness from his cheeks.

"Where did you go to university then?" John asked as he winced slightly as his sides were still sore from laughing too hard.

Mycroft chuckled if he took a sip out of his tea "If I told you, I would have to kill you. My university was for people who had a few pennies in the bank and a political influence to get in and who were going to be in the government. The prime minister from the time to get in gave me a letter of recommendation."

Sherlock smirked and pressed a button on his phone and the sound of Mycroft singing came out. 'Don't stop believin'. Hold on to that feeeeeeeeeeeeeeelin'!' Mycroft from twenty three years sang. Anderson dragged John into the kitchen and they pulled out the video camera and started to film the two Holmes brothers wrestling on the floor. Mycroft was currently winning and that was surprising as Mycroft was more of the mature brother and there he was currently beating his brother with an umbrella. Sherlock was struggling against him and he had ripped Mycroft's suit. Shouts of 'I was the favourite' and 'Mummy liked me better' came from the two men now turned boys.

"I put a tenner down that Sherlock is going to win." John shouted as he tried to keep the camera steady.

"It is obvious that Mycroft is going to win. He has the upper hand." Anderson stated as he zoomed in on the brothers on his phone. "But I will take you up on your bet."

The two brothers continued fighting, Sherlock was now beating Mycroft with a rolled up newspaper. Anderson and John were shouting encouragement to whoever they supported. They could of stopped it but John thought that they needed to release their pent up frustration with each other and he was not wanting to lose another tenner to Anderson."

* * *

Sorry about making fun of Oxford University, I am sure that it is a great school, it was the only university I could think of at the time that was actually real.

Thank you for reading and if you have any ideas I would love to see them and I could use them in a story.


	10. Cats

Disclaimer: I do not own Sherlock and all rights belong to the BBC

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"Sherlock Holmes, give me back my bloody lizard." Anderson screeched as he tried to steal his beloved Anderlizard back from the detective who was currently holding it by its tail and was inspecting the lizard's leg. "Don't hold him like that you are hurting him!" Sherlock removed his grip from the lizard's tail and held it properly in his hand.

John looked up from his paper "Sherlock, give Anderson the lizard back." He wondered how Sherlock and Anderson have not killed each other yet, they argued over most things and they were like children and he felt like a single father to them. Sherlock shouted something how he was using the lizard for science. Anderson screamed at Sherlock again. Sherlock threatened to dissect Anderlizard if Anderson kept complaining.

Anderson imminently stopped complaining, no detective was going to hurt his Anderlizard, that lizard was his pride and joy and it was the closest thing he could have to a real dinosaur. Sherlock smirked and put his finger in the lizards mouth to see how see how far it could stretch open.

Anderlizard snapped his jaw shut and bit down on Sherlock's finger. Sherlock nearly managed to throw the lizard off his finger but luckily Anderson catches the lizard "Who is a good little dinosaur?" Anderson asked the lizard "You are getting extra bugs tonight for biting uncle Sherlock. Daddy is so proud of you." Anderson blushed after just realizing that he had said that out loud, John chuckled and Sherlock made a comment about how dull the lizard was.

"If he is so dull, why did you take the sudden interest in him?" John asked as he put down his paper.

"John I have come to the conclusion that I need to have a new companion. Someone who will be able to assist me with solving crimes and will be able to comprehend everything I say." Sherlock said as he flopped on the sofa.

"But isn't that why I am here?" asked John "I do all those things and but I am happy for you to make a new friend."

Sherlock rolled his eyes "Why would I want another person as a friend? Anderson has made the rank of human being in my book. I don't need another person to be my friend." Sherlock said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "I need to have a pet."

"We already have a pet." John said quickly.

"That is Anderson's pet not mine. Anderlizard is boring and I need something that is less dull than a lizard."

"Anderlizard is not boring." Anderson shouted "He is the most wonderful creature in the world and you are just jealous."

"Yes. I am very jealous of your lizard." Sherlock said sarcastically "The amazing things your lizard can do for example destroy that model city that you made while you pretend that your lizard is Godzilla."

"How do you know that?" Anderson asked blushing again.

"John told me that you filmed Anderlizard destroying the model city and you showed it to him."

"John, you promised not to tell anyone about 'Godzilla the mini Dino!"

John shrugged "Sherlock, you are not having a pet. You will lose interest in it after a day , so there is no point in you having one."

Sherlock stamped his foot "John that is not fair! Why does Anderson get a pet and I can't."

"Anderson is responsible and you are not. And you can barely look after yourself on a good day. And if you have a pet, you are not going to look after it and I will be left to care for it."

"I'll look after it I promise, I'll walk it, feed it, clean up after it and do everything." Sherlock listed off.

"Sherlock the answer is still no."

Sherlock stamped his foot "You are not fair!" He shouted "I hate you!" After that comment Sherlock had stormed off to his room and refused to talk to John when he came out.

"I never thought he would get upset about wanting a pet." Anderson commented "He is like Toby when he found out that he couldn't get a pet dinosaur."

"He will be fine in a day or two." John replied as he turned back to his newspaper "He will try to get you to do what he wants. If you find yourself in a situation where he will try to convince you do what he wants, you should tell him that you will burn all of his case files and he will be off cases for a while or threaten to play his violin. The violin thing is his kryptonite and it will be the death of him. Use this power wisely as with great power comes great responsibility."

Three days later, Sherlock didn't come out of his room that much, he did come out of his room for a short amounts of time to get a can of something and he would hurry back into his room. John was quite happy that Sherlock was in his room as it meant that he couldn't insult his date that he had for the night. Anderson was slightly worried as last time Sherlock spent a lot of time in his room he was mummifying a sheep, so who knows what he was doing.

Anderson knocked on Sherlock's door with a plate of food. He was doing this mostly to check that the detective was still alive, as he hadn't been out for meals in all the time he had been in his room. "Sherlock?" he asked, thinking of the possibility that his flatmate was dead.

" Anderson, what do you want?" Sherlock shouted "I am busy with something and talking to you is wasting my time."

"Mostly checking that you are alive." Anderson shouted "John wants you to eat something as you haven't been at meals for a few days."

"I know that I haven't been at meals." Sherlock yelled "I am alive, you are distracting me from my experiment."

"What are you doing?" Anderson asked "If that involves body parts or chemicals or anything dead…I will kill you with the toast that I am holding."

"Can you slide the toast under the door?" Sherlock asked as he tried to place his experiment in the box "Stop moving!" He shouted at the experiment.

"Sherlock what is in my spare room?" Anderson shouted as he placed the plate on the ground "Open the door right now or I will break it in."

"There is nothing in the room that will be any interest to you. Anderson, go and play with your toy dinosaurs." The last time Toby had visited, he had left his toy dinosaurs at the flat and they had covered the whole flat and Sherlock had taken the opportunity to make fun of him by mostly by placing the dinosaurs in every place imaginable. They were in his cubical, in the cupboards , in his underwear drawer and once Sherlock had laid them out all over the living room floor and had created a dinosaur land that had toy trees and the ground was covered in sand. The only thing Anderson could think to do was invite Toby around play with the dinosaurs, it was a good day even though it took weeks to get rid of the sand, for some reason there was sand in the bathtub, he thought that Sherlock was purposely covering the whole flat in sand just to annoy him.

Anderson sighed, this was worth a try "Sherlock , if you don't open up the door, I will play your violin."

"You don't know how to play violin." Sherlock said as he hid the box in his wardrobe as he knew that Anderson wouldn't leave him alone if he didn't see the room.

"There is videos online, I can learn." The door opened and Anderson walked into the room, there was nothing unusual in the room, that means that it must be in the wardrobe, that is where Sherlock hid things and that is where the dress was. "Let me see the wardrobe."

"Anderson, you know about the dress, and there is nothing interesting in the wardrobe." Sherlock started to shove Anderson out of his room. "Goodbye." A small scraping sound came from the wardrobe and there was a meow.

"Did your wardrobe just meow?" Anderson asked quickly removing himself from Sherlock. "What is in my wardrobe?"

"It must be your imagination. Have you been inhaling the chemicals in the fridge again? You should stop doing that, it will be bad for you."

Anderson made his way to the wardrobe and was about to open it but Sherlock had blocked it. "Tell me what is in the wardrobe or you can tell me about the dress."

Sherlock sighed and closed the door. "I will tell you what is in my wardrobe, only if you don't tell John."

"Fine. I won't." Anderson sat down on the bed as Sherlock took out the box and opened it. "I won't tell John, only if you tell me why you have a dress."

Sherlock sighed again "I will tell you about the dress, only if you won't tell." Anderson smirked, he was going to get his twenty quid from John and he was already planning what to do with the money, it was between buying some alcohol for Sherlock to get drunk or he would take his nephew to that dinosaur movie at the cinema.

Sherlock lifted something furry out of the box and placed it on Anderson's lap. The furry thing started to move and purr. Sherlock had a cat in his room. He was about to yell at Sherlock for the cat but it was too cute, it was a ginger cat with little white paws. "Does it have a name?" Anderson asked.

Sherlock removed another cat from the box this one was a fluffy white Persian cat who looked if it had ran into a window as its face was squished up."Why would I name it? I don't have a name for any of them. You can name them if you want."

"How many cats do you have?" Anderson asked he placed the cat on his lap on the bed and he reached up to pick up the other one. This cat had one eye and its ear was torn slightly.

"There was only three cats I liked in the shelter. The reason for the one eyed cat it is that it looked lonely and it needed me."

Anderson didn't know what to say, Sherlock had adopted cats and had done something nice. This was the nicest thing Sherlock had done something nice for something else. It was a miracle. "Can we keep them?" Sherlock asked.

"We can keep them." Anderson said, he couldn't say no to Sherlock when he was holding a cat. Anderson was considering making his laptop screen saver a picture of Sherlock holding a cat, mostly as it was something he couldn't believe and he needed the constant image of Sherlock holding a cat to prove it.

Later when John came back to the flat he saw a cat lying on top of the TV and Anderson and Sherlock sitting on the floor playing with cats. "Why do you have cats in the flat?" John asked as he removed the TV.

Anderson and Sherlock looked at each other. "My love life hasn't been great lately, so I thought I would buy a cat and ended up with three." Anderson lied, as he knew that John was more likely to let them keep the cats if Anderson had kept them.

"Do you not think it is a bit sad, that after one bad date with Sherlock that you felt the need to buy three cats?" John asked.

"It may be sad, but I don't care." Anderson stroked the cat he was holding "Sherlock had decided to help me look after the cats."

Sherlock nodded "I am going to feed them, clean after them and play with them." The cat he was playing with ran away and jumped on the shelf and knocked something over. "I should clean that up." Sherlock sighed, he would get Anderson to do it but Anderson told him that he would let Sherlock to keep the cats only if Sherlock had the responsibility to look after them.

John sat down on his chair "If you are looking after them , Sherlock, then we can keep them. What do they have names?" John asked.

"Not yet. But we will think of something soon." Sherlock said "I need to think of the perfect names that fit the can. Also, Anderson, we are not naming the cat over a dinosaur." Anderson mumbled something and continued to play with the cat.

The rest of the evening consisted of three men playing with cats and them arguing about cat names and taking cat photos and posting them on their Facebook and other websites, well Sherlock didn't do that part , but Anderson took enough pictures for the flat. They may have acted like crazy cat women but they didn't care. It wasn't until eleven at night when Anderson asked "So Sherlock are you going to tell us about the dress? I am letting you keep the cats."

Sherlock groaned, trust Anderson to use blackmail already, he wanted to keep the cats but he didn't want to tell Anderson and John about the dress. It was a hard decision, but the need to keep the cats was greater than the dress secret. "Fine I will tell you tomorrow." John and Anderson started to yell at each other about why Sherlock had the dress again. While they were arguing at each other Sherlock grabbed the cats and took them to his room so they wouldn't have to listen to the arguing and he wanted to prevent from the cats developing hearing problems, who said he wasn't nice?

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Thank you for viewing. If you have any ideas, please write them down and I will use them. Also you can name the cats as I am not that good at naming things and I think you could come up with something better than Cat 1 and Cat 2 and One eye cat.


	11. The dress

Disclaimer: I don't own Sherlock and all rights belong to the BBC.

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"Sherlock, tell us about the dress." Anderson begged the second Sherlock had shuffled into the kitchen. "You have to tell us about it, you promised." Anderson didn't get much sleep that night due to thinking as many reasons to why Sherlock had a dress, he still went along with his theory that Sherlock was a drag queen and he only performed when drunk.

Sherlock sighed at how enthusiastic Anderson was in the morning, no one could be happy at nine o'clock in the morning, unless there was a murder and then you couldn't help but jump for joy for that. He should get Mycroft to make a law about how happy you should be in the morning. "I know about my promise, you don't have to remind me as I am not an idiot like you."

"So when are you going to tell us about the dress?" John asked after a bite of his toast that was smeared in jam. "You better tell us soon, otherwise we can take away the cats."

"John, you are already obsessed with the cats and it has only been a day. I don't think that you would want to take away your pride and joy of Mr. Cuddlepaws." Sherlock couldn't help but roll his eyes at what John decided to call the ginger cat; he personally thought that John would have chosen a name that was deep and meaningful like Sherlock or something better. But then again he had named the one eyed cat Davey. It wasn't the best name, but it was related to the theme of pirates and he couldn't think of a better pirate to name it after than Davey Jones. Anderson still hadn't had named his cat, Sherlock thought he would chose a dinosaur name for the cat or something like 'Andercat', but according to Anderson, not everything he owns has to have his name in it somehow, as it would be dull and it sounds rather stupid and it is apparently an 'overused' idea.

John sighed at the stupid name that his girlfriend of the week had named his cat, half an hour later they broke up and he couldn't think of anything to name the cat so the name stuck. "Just tell us about the dress, Anderson is going to explode from the amount of caffeine he has had to stay awake as he spent the night thinking of reasons why you would have a dress."

Sherlock took a quick glance at Anderson who was shaking slightly and was mumbling something about being able to see sound. Sherlock started to poke Anderson with a spoon that was lying on the table. "Anderson," Sherlock poked Anderson's face again "How much coffee have you drunk?"

Anderson laughed loudly before quickly saying "I don't drink coffee, it is a calming drink for me. I have had only five energy drinks." He rolled his eyes at the concerned look John was giving him. "John, I am going to be fine, once I find out about the dress I can finish off those five reports I have to do."

Anderson was about to grab another can of energy drink when John took it away from him, Anderson started to protest about his lack of drinks , when a spoon was launched at his head by Sherlock.

John tossed the can of drink into the bin and started to look for others. "I am doing this for your own good, Phil. Those drinks are going to mess you up… well they have done that already."

Sherlock went to the other side of the kitchen and stood in front of the fridge door and started to push John away from the fridge. "John, don't throw away the drinks. They could be useful."

"Why would they be useful?" John sighed "They do more harm than good and I don't want either of you two to do something stupid."

"I don't do anything stupid." Sherlock rolled his eyes "Most things I do is in the name of science so it can't be stupid."

John folded his arms over his chest "But science isn't always right and you can't be right all the time."

"John, when am I ever wrong?" Sherlock scoffed "I am a genius."

"Well, I could list them off but then I would take all day. You are wanting to keep the energy drinks, so that you can use Anderson as your lab rat, aren't you?" John asked "Don't even answer that, I know you are. How many times do I need to tell you? Flatmates are friends not test subjects!"

"You are no fun, you know that." Sherlock pouted. Rather often John felt like a single father to two overgrown children, mostly as he did all the responsible things such as the shopping and often his 'kids' would often fight and sulk if they didn't get their own way. He was expecting to get his 'Best dad' mug soon for Father's day. "If I tell you about the dress right now, will you let me do that experiment, the one that you said I could never do?"

"Just let him do it , John!" Anderson shouted "We need to find out about the dress, he won't tell us unless you let him do the thing with the stuff!"

John sighed "I will let you do that experiment only if you tell us about the dress soon as Anderson really needs to sleep and the longer you wait to tell the story the more crazy he is going to get."

Sherlock smirked slightly before sighing, the things he had to do for experiments, he often questioned if the things he had to do for the name of science was worth the pain he had to go through.

* * *

It had been the fourth murder that week, all were linked together by location and the people being murdered. Models had been getting murdered during catwalk during the fashion week in the city. After four attempts the police had no clue about who the murderer could be and all the rather obvious stuff. After their last failure Lestrade decided to call in the big guns who was the rather brilliant Sherlock Holmes.

Lestrade threw the case file at Sherlock who glared at it and then sent his glare to Lestrade. "I am not doing that." He said as he shoved the file back to Lestrade "I wouldn't even do that for all the serial killers in the whole of London."

Lestrade sighed, he was hoping for a more positive reaction from Sherlock. "You are the only one who can do this. We need to find the killer before he strikes again and you are our only hope."

"Gavin," Sherlock folded his arms "Can't you get someone else to do it ? I am sure that Donovan would love to do it as she is a girl."

"First of all it is Greg." Lestrade rolled his eyes, Sherlock was meant to be a genius but he couldn't remember four letters, it wasn't as if his name was that difficult, it was as common as mud, really he should be having trouble with Sherlock's name and it was a more complicated name than his. Lestrade thought he would just purposely mess up Sherlock's name just to make him feel the soul twisting rage he felt when Sherlock gave him the wrong name. "Secondly, the dress is too small for Sally, we had her try it on."

"Couldn't you do it?" Sherlock rolled his eyes "Just think about how it will make you 'cool' if you do it."

"I did try the dress on, Simon." Lestrade smirked "It was too small. If you do this thing for me I will let you upset the new officers and you can get all the cases you want."

"Fine." Sherlock sighed. Sally walked into the office carrying a plastic bag filled with the disguise. She spilled the contents of the bag on the desk and smirked as Sherlock held the dress away from himself with one finger as if it was infected with the germs of an idiot that might get passed onto him. After a moment of silence Sherlock said "You couldn't have picked a nicer color?"

Hours later Sherlock was waiting in the dressing room, it was only a few moments before he had to make his catwalk debut. After checking his reflection once more, he sighed he looked absolutely ridiculous. Why couldn't he been a male model? It would have saved him having to wear the dress.

To his horror it actually did fit him and to solve the problem with his lack of stuff in the chest department, the dress was heavily padded. The dress was black and reached his mid-calf and was ridiculously low cut. To complete the look he had to wear a pair of high heels and a blonde wig. His face was covered in makeup, his eye was slightly sore due to the eyeliner getting poked in his eye. Sherlock made a mental note of that if he ever had to go in drag again, he would not be wearing eye makeup as it was not worth the pain.

"Are you decent?" Lestrade called from the other side of the door. Sherlock shouted something along the lines of 'I'm decent.' Lestrade sauntered into the room and walked out a second later holding his sides. He never ever thought about what Sherlock would look like in a dress, he was expecting him to look like a really dreadful drag queen from Vegas. To his surprise Sherlock could easily pass for a girl. "Don't you look pretty?" He smirked.

The detective folded his arms and glared at the other man. "Why couldn't I be a male model?" Sherlock sighed "I don't like being a girl." Sherlock lifted up the dress and showed his hairless leg to Lestrade "Donovan claimed that his was essential. I don't see the point in my legs getting waxed , the dress is a long one."

Lestrade burst out laughing again and felt the detective's leg, it was really smooth. "I should try to get Donovan promoted, she did a really good job on your make up and your legs."

"No she didn't!" Sherlock shouted "She nearly impaled my eye with that eye pencil and she tore off my hair with wax. I am going to need years of therapy to recover from this experience. This is so not worth the case with the nun the exploding head."

"Want some cheese with that whine?" Lestrade asked before checking his watch "Sheila, it's time for you to go up." Sherlock grumbled once more before shakily starting to walk to back stage. "Do you know the plan?"

Sherlock glared at Lestrade but it didn't have as much effect as it normally did. "Of course I know the plan. I walk down the catwalk, you and the others are in different locations and when one of you find the killer, we arrest him." Sherlock straightened himself and walked to backstage with as much dignity he could muster.

The speaker announced to the audience "This model will be wearing a piece from the new Leonardo Green collection." The audience squealed and waited for the new model. Sherlock took a deep breath and started to slowly make his way down the catwalk.

Walking in heels was something that Sherlock found rather unpleasant and made not really keen to do it again. The walk down was filled his him nearly falling down several times but he quickly recovered. He scanned the room for the possible killer , but he didn't notice anyone who looked guilty but his brain was mostly working on not falling over in these stupid shoes.

It wasn't until he was halfway back up the catwalk he noticed a man who was moving to back stage holding something in his jacket. That was the killer. Sherlock kicked off his heels and started to run after the man. After seeing the detective starting to run, Lestrade started to make his way backstage, he walked over people in the audience and quickly mumbled apologies as they grumbled at him.

Lestrade found Sherlock holding the killer's arms behind his back and was currently mumbling threats into his ear. The killer struggled around like a loose hen. Lestrade held out his gun and pointed it at the struggling man. "Stop moving!" He shouted, the man stopped struggling and lay on the ground like a dead fish. Lestrade quickly cuffed the man and forced Sherlock to release his grip from the man as Sherlock's knuckles where turning white.

The man shook his head "I can't believe I got beaten by a drag queen." Sherlock looked down at himself and he felt his cheeks slightly red. He had forgotten about his outfit of the night. The moment the man was in the car, Sherlock stripped his dress off and wore his normal clothes and he felt more like himself and swore he wouldn't wear another piece of female's clothing ever again.

* * *

"So why did you keep the dress?" John asked as he noticed that Anderson was face down on the table and he was loudly snoring.

"I tried to get rid of the dress but I kept getting back somehow." Sherlock said as he poked Anderson's side to stop him snoring. "I think my brother had something to do with it. And every year Lestade keeps buying me dresses for the apparent 'anniversary' of the case as a reminder of the event."

John kept a straight face for a moment before doubling over in laughter. Anderson stirred slightly and mumbled something about a drag queen Sherlock. Sherlock rolled his eyes and threw the dress at John. John quickly moved out of the way but the dress hit Anderson. Anderson quickly woke up and looked confused before a spoon got thrown at him again. Anderson picked up a baguette and started to jab it at Sherlock's side. Within seconds a stupid story had turned into a massive dress and bread fight.

Even though it was something that might of sounded strange to everyone else, but it was a normal day in the flat.

* * *

Thank you for reading and if you have any ideas please write them down and I will use them. If you have an idea about the experiment that Sherlock is not alowed to do I would love to hear them. Also I recommend that you don't drink five energy drinks as it will be dreadful on your health and I will be rather upset if you do.


	12. Valentine's Day

Disclaimer: I don't own Sherlock and all right belong to the BBC. Also, sorry if this is a day late, I tried to get it finnsihed for the fourteenth but I got distacted by internet cats.

* * *

Anderson stormed into the flat and dramatically dropped his files on the table and sighed. Sherlock raised an eyebrow as if to ask what was wrong. Anderson sighed and announced "I was going to go out but Lestrade has forced me to go all this paper work for tomorrow and now I can't go out."

"Are you annoyed about not going out because it is Valentine's day?" Sherlock asked.

Anderson sighed "Yes, I am." He snapped "I had plans to go out on a date but I had to cancel them due to work. She was the only girl who was willing to go out with me ever since the date you ended up getting completely drunk." After that date no one with an internet connection had known about his disastrous date and had been not wanting to go out with him in case the detective decided to tag along and get drunk again.

"It's a good thing that you ended cancelling that date." Sherlock said after a moment of silence "She has two boyfriends already and has a history of sexually transmitted diseases." Anderson opened his mouth and no words came out as he was surprised about how Sherlock knew about these things. "Before you ask about how I know. You can tell by the way she walks."

Anderson felt the white Persian cat wrap around his ankles, after a few days he had decided to name the cat Susan. He didn't know how he came up the name but he felt the cat looked like a Susan. Despite him calling the cat Susan, Sherlock branded the cat as 'Dinocat'. "Where's John?" Anderson asked as he removed his coat.

"John said that he had a date with the woman he met in the supermarket, the one with the large mouth." Sherlock stroked Davey's ears, he was currently doing an experiment on how a cat responds to certain physical contact.

Anderson went into the kitchen and poured himself a glass from the brandy he kept in the back of the drawer. "Any plans for tonight?" He called from the kitchen.

"I've got an experiment to do with the cat's responses to touch." Sherlock explained as he took note of how loud Davey purred when he tickled the cat's chin.

"So really you are spending a night in with the cats and you are planning to watch crap telly." Anderson said as he took a large gulp of the drink. "Couldn't you be crashing John's date or doing something better?"

Sherlock stood up and grabbed his coat and made his way to the door. "Anderson, that was the first decent idea you have come up with." Sherlock wrapped this scarf around his neck and opened the door and waited for a moment "Are you coming?" Sherlock asked. Anderson though for a moment before grabbing his coat and making his way out of the door. He could do the work in the morning, that's why they invented coffee.

They found John in the restaurant that was only a few streets away from the flat. John went to the same Chinese restaurant for all of his first dates, Sherlock thought that it was because it was not that expensive and he could quickly go to the flat is things went bad.

The restaurant was rather full for a food establishment that had a minor rat problem. Sherlock looked over the crowd of people and found John by a table at the back that was near the kitchen and he looked completely bored out of his mind. The woman who he was with was talking about her experience with an boyfriend, occasionally John would nod and try and change the subject but the woman kept bring up the same topic again.

The waiter showed them to a table and commented about how Sherlock and Anderson made a cute couple. "He is not my date!" Anderson shouted to the whole restaurant "Just making that clear." John looked up and smiled, these two idiots would be his ticket out of this place, he tried to get out of the place but the large mouth woman kept making him stay with her boring stories.

Sherlock and Anderson made their way to a nearby table and sat down and starting to whisper to each other. "What do you want to do? You are not deducing her, that is mean and it is Valentine's Day." Anderson commented as he ordered something from the menu.

"One of us can drink." Sherlock suggested "And by one of us I mean it can be you."

"I am not drinking. I will end up doing something stupid or what I like to call a 'Sherlock" and I can't risk anything at the moment. My mother has just got internet connection and she will kill me if I do something stupid."

"Anderson, just about everyone you have met wants to kill you. It's not a new fact, I'm surprised that you didn't know that already." Sherlock smirked. "Also the only reason you have so many twitter followers is because people like to make fun of you and they want to know more about you apparent dinosaur fetish."

"Sherlock Holmes, I do not have a dinosaur fetish!" Anderson shouted "I don't know where you got the idea from, I don't have one and never will ever have one!" Sherlock smirked as the whole restaurant turned to look at him and started to make comments about him. "I hate you, I hate you." Anderson kept repeating as he hid his face with menu.

"John!" Sherlock called from over the table "I've upset Anderson again!" John never understood why Sherlock was obsessed with making Anderson's life a misery. John thought that Anderson was actually a decent bloke once you got to know him and he did let him and Sherlock live with him and surprisingly he hadn't kicked them out yet.

"Sherlock, you don't need to spend every living moment of your life making Anderson's life hell." John shouted over the table, he had noticed that his date was looking slightly uncomfortable and was looking for her purse and it meant that he was free to go.

"John, he brings it on himself. He is obsessed with dinosaurs and he likes that TV show about the signing school children in America." Sherlock shouted.

Anderson was on his second drink in the space of twenty minutes "Sherlock, you should be thankful I let you live in my flat. You could be homeless but I am nice to you and let you live with me but you are constantly horrible to me." It turns out when Anderson had some drink in him he was rather truthful and liked to talk about his feelings, Sherlock thought he could use that for blackmail so he planned to keep the drinks flowing for Anderson. "You are just horrible to me and John all the time and I don't know why we put up with you. You act if you are king of the flat with your cheekbones and your purple 'shirt of sex'."

John sensed that Anderson was about start a fight at any moment and he thought he would stop it before it started. He excused himself from his date and he made his way to the other table. Anderson was ranting on about Sherlock and Sherlock would fiddle around on his phone. "Phil, I think you should stop drinking." John sent away the waiter that was taking more drink orders from Anderson.

"John, I am perfectly fine. I can drink as much as I want." Anderson scoffed "Another problem that I have with you Sherlock, is that you act if you are the smartest person in the world but you are not, you don't know about the solar system. You would be defeated by a pub quiz." Anderson stood up "Let's go to a pub quiz and let's see how smart you are Mr Smarty Shirt of Sex."

Sherlock looked up from his phone "I have better things to do than go to a pub with you. How is your relationship with Sergeant Donovan by the way?"

"She has not been returning my phone calls and she has refused to go out on a date with me." Anderson grumbled "Is there something wrong with me?"

Sherlock didn't look from his phone and commented "There is lots of things wrong with you. I think it started off at birth when your mother named you Philip." Sherlock took a drink and realised that something had been added to it. "You have spiked my drink haven't you?" Anderson only smirked "You are a complete git you know that."

John sighed and decided to try and get both men out of the restaurant. "Come on, time to go home." He placed a few notes on his table and Anderson and Sherlock's one and started to drag them out of the place.

"John, why do you act if you are in charge of us? Last time I checked you were not my mother." Anderson asked "You think that you are in charge of us as you are the only one to get dates. The woman you have tonight isn't even that pretty, you could do so much better."

John's date stormed over to Anderson and slapped him and chucked a drink in his face and muttered something about how he was a complete and utter bastard. "I will call you in the morning." Anderson yelled as the woman left the restaurant.

"And this is why this man is single!" Sherlock shouted after he finished off a glass of Anderson's drink. Sherlock had a surprisingly low alcohol tendency and ended up getting drunk rather quickly. "Everyone, here is Philip Anderson, he is single and ready to mingle! And best of all he is rather despite so anyone has a chance." He started to point of several people in restaurant, John shook his head, Sherlock must have been watching Oprah again. "You have a chance!" He shouted as he pointed to an old man. "You have a chance!" this time he pointed to a guide dog." The pointing and yelling continued for several minutes. "I know that all of you would have a chance, I am a genius. I know ash! Oh look karaoke!"

Sherlock pushed him away from Anderson and stumbled to the microphone, "Does anyone have any requests? I sing anything from opera to other music." He slurred "Anderson," he shouted "Sing with me!"

"You aren't a good singer." Anderson scoffed "I'm better than you. I was in a choir when I was younger, I got to sing all the solos, I've could have been a famous singer but I am stuck with you in crime scenes. Anyway sing that song, that goes 'call me maybe' or sing Taylor swift."

"Anderson, do you want to start a fight?" Sherlock said as he held up his fists and started to swing them about. "I'll kill you, I know ash! I can just burn your body and no one will be able to tell if it is your body or cigar ash. Come and fight me, Dinoboy!"

John decided to use his army voice "Sherlock and Phil, you are both going to come here right now and we are going home this instant! And you two are grounded." John shouted "No cats for a week." John cringed at his rubbish punishment, he could do so much worse than removing their kitty privileges, John wondered if he was becoming slightly soft and thought that he should grow a mustache to regain some testosterone.

To his surprise, Sherlock and Anderson actually did listen to him and walked slowly to John. As they walked both of them mumbled death threats to each other. "John, you are horrible." Anderson moaned "You can't take away the cats from us." Sherlock mumbled something in agreement.

"I can and if you keep complaining about it, I will put you on the naughty step and don't think I won't." After that comment Anderson and Sherlock remained silent for the rest of the night.

The trip to the flat was slightly eventful and John swore to himself that he was never taking Sherlock or Anderson outside ever again.

The moment Sherlock and Anderson they collapsed on the sofa. Sherlock was face down on the cushions and he took up most of the sofa. Anderson was teetering on the edge and was about to land onto of one of the cats was lying on the floor.

John did the only sensible thing he could think of, and that was go to bed and he considered going to see his therapist again due to the events that happened that evening.

The next morning Anderson found himself on the sofa with Sherlock. Sherlock was jammed right into his side and was snoring. "I've just slept with Sherlock Holmes!" Anderson whispered before quickly removing himself from the sofa. Anderson wondered if he could count that as his 'gay experience' if he ever was asked if he did have one. Anderson slowly walked into the kitchen feeling rather hangover. Lestrade was going to kill him. The best part of it all was that he had to go into work in a few hours. Anderson had just won the lottery of good fortune and he could already tell that his day was going to be amazing.

"Did you have fun last night?" John cheerfully asked as he turned to the next page in his paper.

"I don't remember any of it apart from going to the restaurant and Sherlock yelling about a dinosaur fetish." Anderson shuffled to a nearby chair and sighed "Do you know what happened?"

"After Sherlock yelled about your dinosaur fetish," John said before getting a glare sent to him by Anderson. "the one you don't have, you started drinking. While you were drinking you told the restaurant about your failed relationship with Donovan. My date slapped you and threw a drink at you and then you told her that you will call her." John smirked as the look of shame crept on Anderson's face. "Then sometime before that you spiked Sherlock's drink and Sherlock tried to set you up on a date with a dog. You two then had a fight over karaoke but I managed to get you out of the restaurant with only minor police assistance. Then when we are walking to the flat as no taxi would take you or Sherlock, on the way to the flat you made a drunk phone call to your mother. By the way she thinks that you need to see a therapist and she has grounded you, she phoned me this morning. To sum up the night in a few words: you acted like more of an arse than normal and you should not drink."

Anderson groaned, he was rather annoyed with himself so acting like an idiot and he felt rather bad for upsetting his mother. He wished that he stayed at home with the cats and done his paperwork instead of going out with Sherlock. "I'm sorry for all the hassle from last night." He mumbled.

Before John could reply, Sherlock walked into the kitchen missing his trousers again. "John, where are my trousers?" He asked. "I am sure that I had them on last night."

John chuckled "You thought that it would be a good idea to throw your trousers in the bin as they were not 'cool enough for a genius' I took them out of the bin and they are in the wash."

"I am sensing that it is a recurring theme of mine," Sherlock glared at the clock that he thought was ticking too loud for this time in the morning. "that every time I get drunk I wake up with no trousers on."

"To solve the problem about your missing trousers, you could not wear any." Anderson commented.

"Then what I am supposed to wear then?" Sherlock questioned with a roll of his eyes. Why couldn't Anderson not think or say anything for a moment, it would save the IQ of the whole street.

"You could wear the dress." Anderson giggled before suddenly shutting up, as Sherlock did the only thing he could think of to make Anderson shut up, punch him in the face. And this started another argument in the flat. John being the sensible bloke he was decided to go the Yard and tell everyone about the events that happened the previous evening.

After John telling everyone he could think of about a drunk Sherlock and Anderson, it became a common tradition at the Yard's Christmas party's to get Sherlock and Anderson drunk. It was mostly so everyone could laugh at the two biggest gits of the crime scenes for the rest of the year as compensation for the misery everyone had to experience from the both of them. John liked to call it karma and it was the worth the suffering he had to put up with from Sherlock and Anderson.

* * *

Thank you for reading and if you have any ideas I will use them in a future chapter, thank you in advance.


	13. Stuck

Disclaimer; I don't own Sherlock and all rights belong to the BBC.

* * *

"You are an idiot." Anderson said with a smirk. "You call yourself a genius but you are the complete opposite. How on earth did you get your hand attached to your head?" Anderson was woken up in the middle of the night by the detective who was wearing clothes that were covered in various substances that looked if they came from the kitchen and there was glue in his hair and he had managed to get a hand attached to his head.

Sherlock sighed and regretted coming to see Anderson about his problem as Anderson being his normal idiotic self was currently laughing at him. Sherlock thought that he should have gone to John for his problem but John was at a girlfriend's house and he would refuse to help him especially after the last time. "For the second time Anderson, I was doing that experiment, the one that I wasn't allowed to do. The experiment exploded and glue got in my hair, I tried to remove the glue but my hand got stuck." Sherlock explained "I am not explaining it to you again. Anderson it is not that funny." Sherlock shot a glare at Anderson who was currently doubled over with laughter, the glare didn't have much effect as normal, but it was difficult to take anyone seriously when they had a hand stuck to their head.

The glare managed to have some effect on Anderson as he sobered seconds after the glare was activated, but then Sherlock had easy access to body parts and explosive chemicals and Anderson liked to live and eat food without the possible threat of death, so it was best for him to shut up. "So what do you want me to do about you sticky situation?" Anderson asked.

Sherlock sighed "Anderson, you may be an idiot but you are the only one who can help me, even though I hate to admit it."

"You are asking for my help because I have an extensive knowledge of chemistry and you think that I will be able to remove the glue using my knowledge of chemistry."

"I was asking for your help as you are the only one in the flat that has full use of both hands. But I am seriously reconsidering my wish for you to help me as you don't even have the full use of your brain."

"I am not an idiot, why do you keep thinking I am one?" Anderson grumbled, he was absolutely sick of Sherlock thinking that he was stupid, he had to admit that he wasn't the most pleasant to Sherlock in the past, but he hoped that they would of have of buried the hatchet or in this instance he would need to bury the whole Trojan Horse before the two would ever want to get along.

"Anderson, I know that you do possess some intelligence, you just don't use your brain most of the time and you remember pointless things such as who is the prime minister or names of dinosaurs." Sherlock explained "Really it is your own fault that you are the way you are and you can't blame anyone else."

Anderson opened his mouth to say something but closed it again; he did this several times so he started to resemble a fish. He was slightly shocked; did the self-proclaimed 'sociopath' Sherlock Holmes complement him? Well, Sherlock's last comment was also an insult, but it was one of the nicest things he had ever said to him. So he decided to take that as a complement. Not knowing what to say Anderson said the only thing that came to mind "Dinosaurs are important." It was a pointless thing to say but he couldn't think of anything better. Anderson reached over and grabbed his dressing gown and started to push Sherlock out of his bedroom. "Get out before you get peanut butter on the carpet." And as an afterthought he said, "You owe me for this, big time. If the kitchen is in a mess, I might take the opportunity to murder you when you still have the hand attached to your head."

Sherlock just rolled his eyes at Anderson's empty threat, Anderson couldn't even kill something that was already dead and he shouldn't even bother making promises that he couldn't keep, Sherlock thought as he was being shoved to the kitchen.

The kitchen was an absolute mess. The only way that could describe the kitchen was if a hurricane, then a tornado , then a tsunami and an earthquake had gone through the kitchen, all at once. Anderson didn't know how it was possible for one person to create that much mess in a kitchen in a few hours, but then again this person was Sherlock Holmes and anything was possible with him.

"In the name of Lestrade, what on earth have you done?" Anderson asked as he glanced around the kitchen and he felt anger start to bubble, mostly since he spent most of the day before cleaning the kitchen himself and all of his effort was in vain, especially after Sherlock had been in in the kitchen. The walls were caked in glue and other substances, Anderson noticed that a red splodge was either jam or tomato sauce. The table that Sherlock had his microscope on was covered in bits of body parts and more glue and for some reason peanut butter. The toaster was on its side and had orange juice in it and it was dripping onto the floor. The only bit of the kitchen that was slightly clean was the blender but that contained a lumpy pink thing. Not even Susan the white fluffy cat was safe from the mess as her white coat was covered in something dark brown. Anderson picked up the cat and smelled her, she smelt of Marmite. How on earth did the cat get covered on Marmite? He thought that like the other cats, Susan would be taking residence in John's room for the night, obviously not.

Sherlock quickly took a glance at Anderson and unlike his normal self he felt slightly nervous. Anderson was a person who liked things to be tidy, well that was an understatement, Anderson was obsessed with cleanliness. Sherlock knew it had to do with his job in forensics as if evidence was contaminated it was basically useless, so that is why Sherlock liked to annoy Anderson by not wearing those stupid blue protective suits when going onto the crime scene, he thought it was rather amusing how protective Anderson was over his crime scenes. Anderson's need for everything being tidy would carry on when he was at the flat, everything was spotless and organised properly, for example all the books were to be placed it sections of the book case by genre and that would be alphabetized and then by the author's name and what year the book was published. It was slightly obsessive but Sherlock did appreciate organisation, as it made it much easier for him to think. Right now Sherlock could tell that Anderson was slightly angry at him and looked if he was going to punch him in the face and was counting to ten as a way to calm himself down, it wasn't working. Sherlock hadn't seen Anderson that angry since that time he went to crime scene slightly drunk for an experiment and he decided that the best place to go to the bathroom was next to the corpse and the evidence might have been destroyed, but they managed to catch the killer, so it was a situations that they could look back on and laugh at, the problem was that Anderson was still slightly upset about that experience and he didn't find it funny.

Anderson took a deep breath before asking "What is in my blender?"

Sherlock took a sigh of relief, he was concerned about getting punched by Anderson. "The thing in the blender is a brain." Sherlock answered.

"Why would you have a brain in a blender, are you trying to make a smoothie or something?" Anderson asked.

"I was experimenting on the consistency a brain would take after it was blended. I forgot the lid though, so there is brain of the ceiling." Sherlock explained right before he found himself with a fist in his face.

"Stop pulling so hard!" Sherlock complained for the hundredth time since Anderson had started to try to remove the hand from his head.

"Stop complaining! Do you want your hand to be off your head or not?" Anderson shouted as he attempted to rip off the hand. He had tried to pull off Sherlock's hand gently but it wasn't working and he didn't want to use the scissors just yet. The glue was stronger that all the other superglue he had ever used in the past. "What glue is this?" he asked "This should be illegal for how strong it is."

"It is banned in fourteen different countries." Sherlock commented before wincing slightly at the force Anderson was using to remove his hand on his head. "Mycroft gave it to me to stop smoking."

"Why would your brother give you glue? He could give you money or something more useful than glue."

"I am not allowed to have any more chemicals from since I blew up the flat and destroyed most of John's possessions. It's been months and John is still annoyed at me for basically making us homeless, why can't he just stop complaining over it?" Sherlock asked.

Anderson without realizing it stopped trying to remove Sherlock's hand and placed his own on Sherlock's head and rolled his eyes. "Of course John would still be upset about losing most of his belongings. They cost a lot of money and unlike you, he is not made of it. John sill has had to use my computer to use his blog." Anderson said slowly.

"Does John know about those websites you go on? He probably knows about the websites and the magazines I found in your room." Sherlock smirked at Anderson's reaction as he was opening and closing his mouth like a fish again. "Anderson, I recommend that you just close your mouth as you wouldn't make a good fish. Also, why is there a copy of this book that I think it is called, 'Thirty Shades of Black' in your room?" Sherlock asked.

"It is for my book club!" Anderson protested weakly. "You have no business going into my room anyway."

"Is your book club for lonely, middle age single mothers?" Sherlock asked "Is it your new place to pick up women? That is basically rock bottom, even for you Anderson. You should start online dating again."

"I am done with helping you, I am not going to stay here and be insulted. I'm going back to bed." Anderson grumbled as he started to leave the kitchen. When he was at the door he realized that his hand was stuck on something. "Sherlock, please let go of my hand."

"Anderson, why would I want to hold your hand, who knows where it has been. I am surprised that you haven't noticed that your hand is stuck to my head and has been stuck for," Sherlock pulled out his phone and checked the time. "six and a half minutes."

"You could have told me about my hand being attached to your head, it would save me being stuck to you."

"There is no point, the glue is fast acting, your hand would have been suck to my head the minute it touched the glue." Sherlock explained.

"So how are we going to get out of this situation then?" Anderson asked "I have to visit my mother today and I am positive that she is going to be thrilled about me being stuck to you. There are enough rumors about me already and I don't want any more to start."

"Anderson, you live with two men and you haven't had a date in weeks, rumors were bound to start. And you do have questionable interests."

"For the last time I don't have a dinosaur fetish! I don't know how many times I have had to tell you that I don't have one."

"It would be much easier if you just admit you have one. Everyone knows that you have one and it is no secret, Andersaurus."

"Do not call me Andersaurs!" Anderson hissed. "You can call me anything apart from that stupid name. I know that you were the one who put that inflatable pool dinosaur in my locker."

Sherlock feigned innocence. "Why would I do something like that? Anderson I thought that we were friends."

"We are not friends! We have never been and we will never will. The only reasons I let you stay is that I like John and you tagged along and I fed you once and you decided to stay like a stray cat." Anderson yelled as he attempted to remove his hand away from Sherlock's head. Anderson smirked at the yelp the detective made when his hair was pulled. "You deserve that for all the hell that you put me through ever since you strolled into the crime scenes."

"Like you are better!" Sherlock growled, "All you do is act like a complete twat who thinks that they know everything."

Anderson snorted "You can talk, have you seen how you act? The way that you have described me is the ever so correct description of Sherlock Holmes."

Sherlock rolled his eyes and sighed dramatically. "Well done Anderson, I would be clapping for your answer but as you can see I only have one hand. But let your rather large head grow larger, maybe you might be able to grow a brain and gain some intelligence in the process."

"I hope that you have to get your head shaved."

"Anderson, shut up before I decide to glue your mouth shut." Sherlock threatened, seconds later Anderson was quiet, Sherlock decided at the opportunity of silence to retreat to his mind palace. He was in the small room of his palace where he kept all of his insults for Anderson, they were not the normal mediocre insults that Anderson would make up, these insults that he stored in the room in his palace were horrible enough that it could even make Sherlock cry if they were directed to him and they weren't even in English, Sherlock didn't know if it made the insults better or worse.

Anderson checked the time; it was four in the morning. He couldn't think of anyone who would help him at that time in the morning and he didn't want to be attached from the freak for longer. He could have called the hospital, but he knew that Sherlock would not be happy about going to a hospital as according to Sherlock 'He would get stupid from the lack of simulation' also Sherlock had this view that only John was allowed to be his doctor. Anderson sighed and called the next best thing to help him, his mother.

Anderson placed his phone on the table and flicked Sherlock's face, the detective growled slightly for being evicted from his mind palace. "What do you want Anderson?" The detective grumbled "I was thinking of ways to kill you with only one hand."

"I phoned my mother, she will be around in twenty minutes." Anderson announced "She is a nurse and she has told me that she has dealt with people sticking things to themselves with super glue."

"Anderson, I don't care what your mother is, I only care about if she can she can remove you like a leach. I think your stupidity is rubbing off on me, and I don't want to be forced to have an average IQ for the rest of my life."

Anderson muttered something under his breath and glared at the detective for a few moments before saying. "We need to go to the bathroom."

"I certainly don't want to go the bathroom, so why should you decide when we are going?"

"Sherlock, we are stuck together. Where I go, you go; it's a rather simple theory."

"But you are forgetting; when I stay, you stay. I hope that your child like brain will be able to comprehend that. Your nephew would be able to understand that, compared to you, he is a genius."

"I will be sure to tell him that." Anderson snapped. "But to the main issue, if you don't let me go to the bathroom, I will happily pee on your experiment and it will destroy all of your results." Sherlock mumbled something before standing up and slowly walking behind Anderson, he occasionally winced his hair got pulled.

The trip to the bathroom was rather uncomfortable. The first problem was walking up the twelve stairs that led to the bathroom. The two men nearly fell down the stairs several times and both of them ended up getting shoved into a wall a few times. The bathroom experience was awkward but Sherlock learned that Anderson had stage fright.

Once the adventure of going to the bathroom was completed, they made their way back down the twelve steps of doom; Anderson felt that he should give elevators more credit for how much time and pain they save people from. He thought that there should be a national holiday for elevators. "We will never speak of this again." He said to the slightly red detective. "You will not mention this to anyone and it stays between us."

"I am already deleting this. It was a slightly uncomfortable for the both of us and I am officially staying away from glue so none of us have to go through that again."

Anderson heard the front door open and the call of his name being shouted by his mother. "We are in the kitchen!" He shouted. A few seconds later, the head of his mother poked through the door frame. "As you can see, we are slightly stuck."

Anderson's mother laughed at took out her phone and took several pictures of the two men together. Anderson moaned at his mother and she only took more pictures. "Philip, smile you will look so much better. I am posting this on Facebook."

Sherlock quickly deduced Anderson's mother: Three dogs, avid reader, been a nurse for over ten years and had a slight caffeine addiction and she had an embarrassing tattoo. She introduced herself but he didn't think it was important enough information to keep and christened her with the name 'Mother'.

"How did you get stuck like that?" Mother asked as she shoved her phone in her pocket and scanned the kitchen that now resembled a crime scene. "I am not cleaning that up. You can clean up that mess yourselves."

"Well this idiot's brother decided to give him glue that is banned in fourteen countries. Then he decided to do an experiment that I banned him from doing as it involved a brain, superglue, peanut butter and a blender." Anderson explained as shot a glare at the detective who just stuck out his tongue at him. "Can you act you age for once in your life?"

"Why would I want to do that? I would end up like you and I don't think the world is ready enough for two of you. And to make matters worse one of your clones would end up breeding with some unfortunate soul and it would result in the end of the world, due to the low intelligence level your offspring would have."

"Once we are unstuck from each other, you are moving out. I don't care where you go as long as you are not in my flat." Anderson threatened.

"You wouldn't do that," Sherlock scoffed "If I go, I am taking John with me."

"John is not some possession of yours. He is not your little lamb that follows you wherever you go." Anderson shouted, "And if you are taking John, I'm keeping the cats."

"Yes Anderson, you should keep them. Maybe they will be a good replacement for a real woman, and when they manage to clone dinosaurs, you can get one to be your girlfriend and do nasty things to it."

"Why don't you do the same with the deerstalker! " Anderson shouted before starting to hit Sherlock with his free hand, after the first hit Sherlock joined in the fight. Insults were thrown after each and every hit. After a few moments watching the two men hitting each other, Mother was starting to get rather annoyed at her son fighting and worse he was fighting like a complete girl who had no experience fighting.

"Stop fighting this instant!" Mother roared while shooting what Anderson liked to call her 'glare of doom', instantly the two men stopped fighting and stared in shock in how a short woman could have such as loud voice. "Philip, I am very disappointed in your behavior." Sherlock smirked at Anderson getting told off. "Don't think that you are not in trouble either young man." Sherlock was about to protest but Anderson butted in before he could say anything.

"I am really sorry about you having to see that." Anderson apologized, "We will make sure that it won't happen again."

"I will make sure that it won't happen. I am not going to separate the pair of you until you apologies to each other. It appears that you two have some issues that need to be resolved." Mother sat down on a chair and cleared her throat. "Phillip, how does Sherlock make you feel? And remember to use your words."

After two hours of 'friendship counselling' Mother had decided that they had made up after two extremely fake apologies from the two men, but luckily she seemed to believe their apologies. She decided to put an end to their misery of being stuck together. She managed to get them unstuck from each other but at one cost.

Sherlock ended up bald. "I look absolutely dreadful; I look like my grandfather when he was in the coffin." Sherlock complained as he looked at his reflection in the mirror, occasionally he would rub his hand over the smooth surface as if it would make his head grow back faster. "I am not leaving the flat."

"Stop being such a drama queen!" Anderson called from over the kitchen where he was cleaning brain off the ceiling. "Just wear a hat. If it will make you feel better, I'll buy you a new deerstalker."

"It's so nice that you are getting along again." Mother said as she grabbed her jacket from the hook. "I shall be leaving; your father will be thinking that I am doing something stupid."

"It was lovely meeting you." Sherlock said in a sickly sweet tone. "And may I say thank you for helping me and your son with our problems."

"I'm so glad that I could help you two. Next time you get yourselves in a stupid situation, I will beat some sense into the both of you." Mother smoothed down her son's hair and kissed his cheek. "Call in a few days, I want to make sure that you don't kill each other.

Once mother had left the flat, Anderson lent against the door. "You should be an actor as I didn't know you could act that nice, I think my teeth are all rotten from you acting sweet, it was rather nauseating."

"You weren't much better. You offered to buy me a hat and you cleaned brain off the wall." Sherlock commented.

Anderson asked, "Don't you think that we should stop fighting all the time? it is slightly childish and we are in our thirties."

"If we didn't fight, we would kill each other from the lack of simulation." Sherlock explained "We need to fight or nothing would ever get done in the flat." Anderson mumbled something and continued to clean the kitchen while Sherlock played his violin. It was basically their way of apologizing to each other by staying out of each other's ways and doing their own thing. It might of not been the best way to apologize, but it was better than nothing.

From that day on, there was an official glue ban added to the very long list of things banned from the flat just to avoid any more sticky situations and to save Sherlock the humiliation of having to go bald again.

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Thank you for reading and if you have managed to read the whole thing then, well done. It has been my longest chapter so far and I have to admit I am rather proud with how long it turned out to be.

If you have any ideas please write them down and I will use them in a future chapter, thank you in advance.


	14. Sick

Disclaimer: Sherlock does not belong to me and all rights belong to the BBC. Also Harry Potter does not belong to be and all rights go to J.K. Rowling.

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It was John's fault, Sherlock had decided. John had decided to be a doctor and actually be with sick people and he had brought the germs to the flat and had contaminated Sherlock with them. Right now Sherlock felt as if he was dying and he was bored, but he didn't know what was the worse feeling. Since he was ill John had banned him from doing any cases until he was better, so he was stuck watching some documentary about Victorian murders but that didn't help cure his boredom.

"John, I want more tea!" Sherlock shouted from the sofa. "And I want more tissues." Sherlock blew his nose on a crumpled up tissue and threw it on the ground even though the bin was close to him. "John, the tea!" Sherlock called again just to make sure that John heard him.

"Sherlock, make your own tea!" John shouted from upstairs. "It is just a cold and I am positive it doesn't make you unable to use your legs and the tissues are on the table, I am sure that you can reach them with one your rather long arms."

Sherlock loudly moaned so John would hear that he was suffering. "John, it feels like I am dying and my brain is going to rot from the lack of stimulation. There has been a case and I want to go to it."

"Sherlock, if I make you tea, will you stop complaining for five minutes?" John asked, he hoped that if he did make Sherlock tea the detective would stay quiet enough, so that he could finish off the report that he kept putting off for about a week and it was needing to be handed in that afternoon. John was considering getting a professional organised to nag him to do things, but then again he had Sherlock to nag at him to do the job for free.

"John, I will stop complaining if you let me go on that case," Sherlock complained like a child not getting a toy that they wanted. "It's a triple homicide and I don't want to miss it. It has been the only one of those cases of the year and I don't want Anderson to mess it up."

"Sherlock, you are not going and that's final." John said as he went down stairs and switched on the kettle. "Anderson won't mess things up and I am sure that the police will be able to cope for one case without you."

Sherlock made a gurgling noise at the back of his throat in frustration. "John, they won't be able to manage without me, the police are idiots. And you know that Anderson will mess it up, you are just being nice to him."

"What has Anderson done to upset you this time?" John sighed, from a few months of him and Sherlock moving in with Anderson he discovered that Sherlock would mostly insult Anderson when Anderson did something to 'upset' Sherlock. The ways that Anderson would 'upset' Sherlock, was doing stupid things like changing the brightness settings on the television or buying the wrong type of yogurt in the shop, it was just the most pointless things the detective would be 'upset' over.

"Anderson was complaining about my violin playing at apparently 'ungodly' hours in the morning and he has confiscated my violin." Sherlock grumbled, "Why does he need to make life so much harder for me?"

"I'm surprised about you having a proper reason to be upset." John said after a moment of silence, "Maybe if you have a violin playing schedule you can get your violin back." John suggested.

Sherlock rolled his eyes and sighed "John, I play the violin when I think and I can't organised my thinking time. Genius can't be planned it has to be harvested at the start of a crop of inspiration." He reached over and grabbed the cup of tea John had passed him and took a gulp of it and pulled a face after it. "You have made this wrong." He grumbled as he shoved the cup into John's hands.

"What is wrong with your tea?" John sighed "I have made it the same way as I always do." He went through his head for his past actions he did to make Sherlock's tea. He wondered about if he added too much hot water into the cup or did he leave the tea bag in for ten seconds too long?

"You have made the tea in the wrong mug." Sherlock muttered "You have failed me John."

John decided to ignore the last comment the detective made and asked. "What is wrong with that mug? It is a perfectly fine mug and it is clean and there are not any eyeballs in it, so I don't see what is wrong with it."

"It is not my mug John. I can't drink tea that is not in my mug." Sherlock was rather particular about his mug. The mug was a large red item that Mrs Hudson bought him as a gift for his birthday, and it was the only thing he would drink out of, well that wasn't exactly true as he had his best china but that was only saved for tea parties with Moriarty. "I can't drink from it as it is one of the mugs that you and Anderson both use."

"Sherlock, it is just a mug. I am sure that the mug you drink from doesn't affect the taste of tea. You won't to be able to catch an illness from me or Anderson by sharing a mug, and is has been washed two times and stuck under that UV light for four minutes. So you can drink from the mug and not die from it, I know this as I am a doctor."

"You managed to bring the germs to the flat to let them contaminate me and get me ill." Sherlock huffed and looked as if he was going into one of his infamous sulks.

"Sherlock, I did not bring any germs home. The reason that you got ill was your own fault for going to the clinic to collect samples of mucus from people in the waiting room and you let that woman cough on you. So you can stop blaming it on me!" Sherlock was about to but in and moan about how John's story wasn't right and how he was the victim, but John quickly added in before the detective could open his mouth. "Drink your tea and stop complaining."

To his surprise Sherlock did what he told him to do, Sherlock must have been ill if he did something that someone told him to do. The phone rang and John quickly answered it, it was Sarah wanting him to go into the clinic due to the extra turn out of people who had succumbed to the cold.

"I need to go into work and I will be gone for a bit." John said as he grabbed his mobile and his keys from the table. "Will you cope when I am gone?" John asked "I'll try and get someone else to look after you."

"I don't need to be looked after." Sherlock grumbled as he pulled the blanket over his head to block out John. "I am perfectly capable of looking after myself, I am not dead yet."

"Says the man who couldn't even reach less than ten inches away from himself for a tissue. Anderson is at that case and I don't think he won't be back until later, so that takes him out of the picture. I can get Mrs Hudson took look after you." John suggested.

"Mrs Hudson is on a day trip with that Mr Gordon, the man who owns that pie shop and lives across the road from her sister." Sherlock explained as he blew his nose again and threw the tissue on the ground, inches away from the bin again.

"Sherlock, I moved the bin closer to you so you could put the tissues in the bin and not on the ground." John grumbled as was about to leave the flat. "I am just going to let the cats look after you then. Don't blow up the flat and there is soup in the microwave and medicine in the cupboard." John listed off before leaving the flat.

As if John instructed them to do so, the cats decided to jump on the sofa and decided to use Sherlock as a rather large cushion. Davey went up close to Sherlock's face and stared at Sherlock with his one eye. Sherlock wondered if something with one eye winked or blinked when they closed their eye.

John had been gone for ten minutes and Sherlock was bored out of his skull. He did try to talk to his skull but he got bored due to the lack of response from the skull. Sherlock hated to admit it but he grown used to the full time company of Anderson and John. It was the first time that he was left in the flat alone ever since he moved in with Anderson, the normal event that happened in the flat was if either Anderson or John was gone, the remaining one would stay in the flat. Sherlock absolute hated the arrangement at first as it meant that he would have to spend long periods of time with Anderson but it wasn't that bad as he could argue with Anderson and annoy him to past the time.

Sighing again due to the lack of something interesting to do, Sherlock reached over and picked up a note book and a permanent marker and wrote, 'I am bored and dying. Entertain me.' He held his little sign up to the bookcase where there was a not so hidden camera placed next to a book end and started his timer on his phone. In less than five minutes a large black car pulled up outside the flat and the click of an umbrella could heard as it went up the twelve steps to get into the flat.

"I thought that the flat would be cleaner." Mycroft commented as he walked into the flat and he pushed a tissue away from himself with his umbrella.

"I am dying; there is no point in having a clean flat when I am on death's door." Sherlock moaned as he coughed loudly.

"Well you are complaining too much for someone who is dying. What is it that you are dying from? The plague? A broken heart? Please tell me what it is dear brother." Mycroft placed a hand over his heart dramatically.

Sherlock rolled his eyes at his brother and his unusual outburst " I have a cold, that John gave me." He sighed as he blew his nose again. "Mummy shouldn't have let you do those drama classes at private school. Mycroft you should have of done those gym classes instead of acting lessons, they would have been much more use to you."

"Is it possible for you to talk to me without commenting on my weight?" Mycroft asked, "And before you ask, the diet is going well and I got that cake and the muffin basket you sent me, the Yard enjoyed the baked goods and they are asking for more."

Sherlock sighed at his brother, so much for thwarting the diet again. His brother must have got wiser about his attempts to ruin his diet, Sherlock knew that he managed to ruin his brother's diet three times as after every muffin basket he had sent, he noticed that the button's on his brothers waistcoat were slightly stained. Sherlock looked up at his brother who was quickly pressing the keys on his phone, before he could ask on whom his brother was texting, Mycroft looked up from his phone and saw the confused look on his brother's face.

"It is John." Mycroft stated. "He wants you to take your medicine and he reminds you not to blow up the flat." Sherlock groaned and he placed Mr Cuddlepaws over his face hoping that his brother couldn't see him.

Sherlock smirked as heard his brother's footsteps as he left the room, maybe his brother thought that he was invisible and decided to go home due to a lack of a brother to mother hen over. The smirk quickly disappeared as the weight of Mr Cuddlepaws was lifted from his face and a thermometer was shoved into his mouth. Sherlock spat out the thermometer and crossed his arms.

"I am not having that in my mouth. You can't make me have it." Sherlock protested as he shot a glare at his brother but it didn't have much effect due to the fact his brother was only a pair of antlers missing from looking like Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer.

"Sherlock I told Mummy that I would look after you." Mycroft reached over and picked up the thermometer and handed it to his brother. "And since I am looking after you I recommend you to put the thermometer in your mouth or I will happily put it up the other end and I know that you wouldn't want that to happen."

Sherlock sighed and stuck the thermometer in his mouth and started to create a list of reasons to hate his brother, reason number three hundred and ninety-four – Mycroft was rather good at getting his own way with him. After a few moments Mycroft took out the thermometer and made a clucking noise at the back of his throat and opened up the bottle of cough syrup and poured it out on to the spoon. The sickly sweet smell of cherries was strong and Sherlock could smell it even though he had a blocked nose.

The smell brought Sherlock back to his childhood on a memory he hadn't deleted. As he was a rather sickly child and he would get the cold at least once a month, mummy would buy cough syrup in bulk once a year so it could last the whole of the year so she could never run out and she was prepared when Sherlock decided to get ill. Sherlock hated the syrup as he thought that the smell was horrible and it burnt his nose and it would make his mouth taste funny for hours after he took it.

"Open up." Mycroft commanded as he held the spoon to his brothers face. Sherlock refused and pulled the blanket over his head. "I can see you and your invisibility cloak is not working, Harry Potter."

Sherlock pulled the blanket down and gave his brother a confused look. "Who is Harry Potter?" he asked "Is he a scientist?"

"Mummy made us watch the films with our cousins at the last time we visited." Mycroft said trying to help his brother remember. "The films with a boy wizard and he goes to a magic school and he has to destroy the dark lord." Sherlock still looked confused and Mycroft sighed. "We are watching the films so you can know what I am talking about. There are books, you should read them."

Sherlock was about to ask more questions to distract his brother but Mycroft shoved the spoon in face again. "I am not taking it Mycroft."

"Stop acting so childish!" Mycroft sighed and tried to resort to childhood tactics his mother used to get Sherlock to take his medicine , he knew that he would look absolutely stupid doing it , but it could work. "Here comes the pirate ship." He said as he moved the spoon in a swaying movement. Sherlock couldn't help but smirk at his brothers attempts to give him the syrup. "The pirate ship is about to land onto the treasure island."

Sherlock rolled his eyes at his brother. "Mycroft that is not going to…" Sherlock was shut up by his brother shoving the spoon in his mouth. Mycroft smirked as Sherlock shot him a glare.

"I had to do it that way or I could tell your friends about how you wore the dress to sneak into a party or the other time you wore it which ended up with me saving you from getting engaged to that man at that ballroom dance. And I am sure that people would love to know about how you let our cousins to put make up on you and dressed you up as a fairy, and it wasn't even Halloween." Mycroft said with a smirk.

"You are absolutely evil." Sherlock commented "No wonder the prime minister is absolutely terrified of you."

"I think that I am allowed to be evil, I am related to you. You are not exactly the easiest person to live with."

Sherlock asked "How would you know? You were at private school since you were twelve; you were only at home for the holidays."

"When you were younger, you decided to hang around me all the time. I used to give you my school text books to read so you would stay quiet for five minutes. But then you would ask for a pirate book to read instead and I would read 'Treasure Island' to you , as you preferred people to read stories to you." Mycroft chuckled at the memory. "I don't think you remember this but one summer you blew up your room and we had to share a room for the whole of the holidays. Every morning you would wake me up at five o'clock in the morning, so you could play pirates and you would turn the room into your pirate ship. The worst part of playing pirates with you is that you would make me wear the pirate hat and walk about limping as if I had a peg leg."

"You weren't the best pirate. You would always claimed to be saving your strength while you would do your homework and eat cakes, while I would look for treasure. " Sherlock commented before yawing quietly as he scratched Davey's ears. "Can you read to me?" He asked.

Mycroft nodded and walked over to his suit case and pulled out an old copy of Treasure Island with tape holding the spine together and faded yellow pages. "I had a feeling that I was going to need it today." He said as he walked over to the sofa and squeezed into the small space Sherlock had left him. He opened the book and started to read. "SQUIRE TRELAWNEY, Dr. Livesey, and the rest of these gentlemen having asked me to write down the whole particulars about Treasure Island, from the beginning to the end…"

"Sherlock, Lestrade wants you to look at these pictures from the case." Anderson said as he walked into the flat. He noticed that there was an umbrella leaning against the door frame and he recognized it as Mycroft's. He noticed that the flat was rather quiet for Mycroft visiting as normally when he visited there would be yelling and fighting. The flat was silent. Anderson wondered what brother had killed the other as it could only be the only reason why the flat was quite. Anderson took out his phone and got it ready to call Lestrade when he found a body.

He looked around the rooms of the flat and he didn't find anything, until he got to the living room. He found the two brothers who were still rather alive on the sofa together and they were both sleeping. Sherlock took up most of the sofa and was covered by the cats so only his head was the only part of him visible. Mycroft had removed his suit jacket and his tie and was slumped over on the chair with the book in his hand threatening to fall onto the ground. Anderson smirked and took several pictures of the scene that was in front of him. Anderson had decided that he would try and convince the brother's parents to make the pictures he took the family Christmas card even though it was early.

"So much for claiming that you hate each other." Anderson muttered as he took a few more pictures. "John is not going to believe this." He said as he sent a picture to John. It wasn't a common sight to see the two brothers not at each other's throats. He knew that both of the brothers would deny it to their graves that they did this, but thankfully a picture is worth a thousand words and it showed that despite all their differences the brothers did care for each other. Anderson looked at the brothers one more time before he started to enjoy the rare silence that was not usually in the flat.

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Thank you for reading and if you have any ideas please write them down and I will use them.

I am planning to start writing another series of little stories, like this one, that will be Sherlock and Mycroft as I love to write them. I am still not sure if it will be stories from their childhoods or when they are older, or a mixture of both.


	15. The Prank War part 1

Disclaimer; Sherlock does not belong to me and all rights belong to the BBC.

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It had started off with a carton of milk in the fridge. One Saturday morning, Anderson was up early and no one else was awake in the flat. He decided to make a bowl of his favorite cereal and watch the morning cartoons. Sherlock had moved the cereal again. Anderson sighed as he started to dig through the kitchen to find his cereal. Ever since Sherlock had moved in, he had developed a liking for the game, which John had called : 'Hide the cereal.' Anderson didn't know why Sherlock did it , Anderson's theory was that it was Sherlock's way of getting back at him for all the years he had called him 'Freak' with Donovan.

Anderson managed to find the find his cereal lodged behind a jar of ears in the small area in a drawer where the vegetables were kept. It was a good place to hide something as the only person who went into the vegetable drawer was John and he rarely went into there. Their diet in the flat consisted of mostly takeaways , ready meals and beans on toast. It wasn't the best diet in the world but all three of them worked and Mycroft still hadn't brought them that cook he promised that he would them after the fight with Sherlock had resulted in the television getting an umbrella impaled in the center of the screen and a window getting smashed. Anderson grabbed his cereal and grabbed the milk from the side of the fridge. The carton felt lighter than normal, he thought that he bought milk the other day. Shrugging he started to pour out the cereal and once he was on the milk, he could feel something moving around in the milk. Anderson got a glass jar and poured the milk into the jar. The milk had a slight green tinge to it and the object that was stuck in the small opening of the carton. Anderson got a knife and started to cut open the top of the carton and lying on the bottom was a dead bird. Sherlock had put a dead bird in the milk. Anderson growled and brought some items from the kitchen and started to make his way upstairs.

Sherlock had the rudeness to still be sound asleep after what he had done. He could have bloody poisoned me!' Anderson thought as grabbed the pot and wooden spoon and started to bang it loudly. "Sherlock Holmes, get your arse out of this bed right now!" Sherlock stirred slightly in his sleep and rolled over. "Wake up! Wake up!" Anderson shouted in Sherlock's ear. Sherlock never was one for sleeping but after doing three cases one after the other he just collapsed on his bed and didn't move for over twelve hours and Anderson found out that it was impossible to wake the detective up when he was sleeping.

"Phil , why are you making all this racket at this time in the morning?" John grumbled as he walked into the room. "What are you doing?" he asked as he saw Anderson standing over Sherlock and screaming in his ear as he hit him with a wooden spoon. Sherlock mumbled in his sleep and let out a snore. John started to slowly back out of the room. "I'm sorry for interrupting your session. I won't be able to get that out of my head now."

Anderson looked up and stopped hitting Sherlock. "It is not what it looks like. This arse tried to poison me with the milk. He put a dead bird in the carton and the milk is turning green." Anderson explained.

"He puts things in the food all the time." John grumbled "It's not new and you should know about this, you have lived with him for months. If you are not happy with what he is done pull a prank or something." John turned around and left "Try and keep the noise down, some of us have work in the morning."

Anderson spent the rest of the morning brainstorming what to do. The only thing that he could think of doing was removing something from Sherlock's room. It wasn't the best idea but it was better than nothing.

He ended up taking all of Sherlock's left shoes. And when they were called into the Yard for a case Sherlock had to wear sandals. Through the day people would look at him and laugh to themselves. They kept asking him where the beach was and a young officer even yelled ' cowabunga' at him. Sherlock responded to the surfer slang he got that day by revealing the reasons why the officers were single and he made them cry as he was feeling ever so kind, when he looked as if he was going to a beach wedding. Sherlock knew that his was war and he was planning to win it.

Sherlock woke up at a early hour in the morning and went into the bathroom with a bottle of fake tan he got from Molly, he opened the cabinet and found the container he was looking for. The pulled out a large tub of body lotion that smelt of something girly. Sherlock took the tub of lotion and made his way into the kitchen. He opened the lid of fake tan and squeezed out a small amount into the cap of the bottle and inspected it. The fake tan gloop was pale in color and it smelt like rather strong chemicals that burnt Sherlock's nose when he smelt it. He squeezed the contents of the whole bottle into the tub of lotion and mixed it in. thankfully the color of the lotion didn't change color and the strong smell from the fake tan was masked by the girly smell of the lotion. Sherlock mixed the lotion and added a few finger prints to make it look if no one had touched it. Sherlock placed the lotion in the same location where it was before. He noticed that his fingers that he pressed into the lotion that turned a slight orange in color. Sherlock scrubbed his hands to get rid of the orange color, it came off slightly but it was still noticeable. Sherlock thought that he wouldn't be showing his hands to anyone, but after the main result, people would know it was him.

Half an hour later Sherlock heard the shower go on and after ten minutes someone left the bathroom. He waited for the scream that he had expected, but there wasn't one. Sherlock wondered if the fake tan didn't work or if Anderson didn't use the lotion. Minutes later John came down the stairs and walked into the kitchen and he was slightly orange. Sherlock looked up from Anderson's laptop that he was pretending to look and snickered at John's appearance.

"What are you laughing at?" John asked as he started to make up his tea. "Is there something on my face?" After not getting a response from Sherlock as the detective was laughing at him, he checked his reflection on the side of the kettle and found out that he resembled a Kardashian. "Sherlock did you do this?" John growled, he was not going to work looking like a carrot, his patients would not be able to take him seriously. John considered taking the day off but there was a chicken pox outbreak and they needed him at the moment.

Sherlock being the good friend he was, answered with "It was Anderson." John gave that smile that he always gave when he was angry and Sherlock felt slightly worried as he learned from experience that when John gave that smile it meant that poop had hit the fan.

"Did he?" John asked in a false happy tone. "Well isn't that nice of him to make me look as if I have jumped into a bag of cheese puffs?" John exclaimed as he tried to scrub of some of the orange from his skin, however the orange wasn't shifting off. John had to end up going to work and ended up getting the nickname 'Dr Kardashian' from the receptionist and when he got home he decided to make a few phone calls.

A few days later, the orange from John's skin eventually did fade, mostly but in certain areas the orange was still there. Sherlock noticed that John didn't seem to be angry at Anderson not anymore and he couldn't decide if that was a good thing or not. But knowing John it was a bad thing.

One dinner time, when all three of them were at the table, John asked. "Philip, do you have any plans for the weekend? I've got someone who will be willing to go on a date and they are free on Saturday."

"I might be able to see them." Anderson said trying to sound casual even though he was jumping up and down inside and squealing. Someone actually wanted to date him. "So what are they like?"

John took a sip of tea and smirked into the cup. "They have a great personality, they are funny, rather cute and smart. They are totally are your type. Do you want me to call them and set the date up?"

"That would be good." Anderson smiled as he went back to his meal. "Thank you, John."

John quickly excused himself and started to make a call to someone and Anderson was in a good mood. Sherlock was officially confused about what was happening, he thought that John would be angry at Anderson, but he wasn't as he was setting him up with a date. Was this what friends did for each other when one was angry at another friend? Sherlock shrugged and went back to his experiment and ignoring Anderson's shouts of 'No experiments when I am eating.'

A few days later, Sherlock noticed that Anderson was spending too long in the mirror and he later realized that he had that date that John set up for him. Even though he had thought about it for two days he couldn't think of a reason why John would set Anderson with a date, he considered asking John about it but John had been a bit strange lately. Not in a weird way but in a way that he had been a lot more secretive lately and he would smirk when Anderson was in the room.

"Anderson, please step away from the mirror, I don't want you to break it with your face." Sherlock commented, "Where are we going tonight?" Sherlock asked "Somewhere that doesn't serve alcohol would be a good place for us."

"What makes you think that you are going on a date with me?" Anderson snorted as he smoothed down his hair once more.

"Anderson, it would be easier for the both of us if you just let me go with you. It would save you time and you know that I am going to come with you if you like it or not." Sherlock explained as he put on his coat.

"Fine," Anderson sighed. "Make sure that you don't drink and you keep your comments to yourself and go to your 'mind palace' or something."

Sherlock smirked. "I knew that you were going to let me go with you." Anderson muttered something and they both left the flat after a shout to John that the both of them were leaving.

They were meeting at a nearby pub, mostly because Anderson was banned from a few restraunts because of Sherlock's behavior. The pub was and had several large comfortable looking chairs scattered around the place. The pub was empty apart from an old bartender who was writing something on a chalkboard. Anderson ordered two drinks and waited for his date, while Sherlock counted the number of peanuts in a tub.

After half an hour the pub was filling up with people to watch the football and generally to drink their troubles away, but there was no sign of Anderson's date. After checking his phone in the fiftieth time in ten minutes, Anderson had given up hope and was considering going home when someone asked.

"Are you Philip Anderson?" The person asked. Anderson noticed that the person who asked the question was a rather large man with a beard and several tattoos and he looked if he had clearly been in prison before. Anderson merely nodded and hoped that this man wasn't going to mug him or at least beat him before he had a chance to meet his date. The man grabbed Anderson's arm and shook it. "I'm Bubba." He said in a thick undeniable accent. "John said that you would be good-looking and he was right."

Sherlock looked up and realized that John was definitely an evil, evil man under the jumper. Sherlock smirked at Anderson's obvious discomfort and decided to take a few photos to cherish the memory.

"I am sure that you are mistaken, I am sure that you have a great personality but I was expecting a female." Anderson said quickly as he thought of ways to make John pay for this.

Bubba looked hurt for a moment before clenching his fist. "I didn't drive two hours to be insulted by you, all I wanted was a fun evening and you are ruining it for the both of us."

Anderson sighed and did the only nice thing he could think of and bought Bubba a drink and at least spend some time with Bubba, his grandmother would be proud of him as she did teach him to be a gentleman and there he was buying a man a drink. Occasionally he would look up and glare at Sherlock who was taking notes on something and he had a constant smirk placed on his face. Anderson knew that the notes that Sherlock was taking was about this 'fun' experience and how it could be used as blackmail in the future, Anderson decided not to do anything stupid as there was enough rumors already.

After an hour Anderson was feeling more uncomfortable than he did when he did when he started the date. Bubba had spent the last hour talking about his last street fight and his flower garden and how he was having trouble with his roses. Anderson would nod along and occasionally make a comment about flowers. He decided that before he turned to alcohol to get him out of this, he decided to just make an excuse and leave. Fortunately Sherlock had a similar Idea and was wanting to go.

"Anderson , you are boring me." Sherlock complained as he dramatically flopped down on a chair. "Didn't I get you off a murder charge?" Sherlock asked as he opened up his note-book and started to take more notes. After that question, Bubba had completely ignored Anderson and started to talk about prison murders with Sherlock who would take notes for when there was a case on the murders. Seeing this as a good opportunity to leave, Anderson quickly grabbed his jacket and left the pub. He felt confused; did Sherlock Holmes steal his date? Shaking his head he decided that it would be best is he went home, so he could murder John.

The moment Anderson went through the door, he was greeted by a smirking John. "Did you have fun tonight?" John asked.

"You set me up with a man!" Anderson growled "I was expecting a woman."

"I didn't tell you if it was a man or a woman. It was your choice to go on the date, I was being a good friend." John smiled.

"Good friend my arse." Anderson scoffed. "This isn't over, I will get you back for this." Anderson threatened. "I am going to bed and in the future don't set me up with dates. I rather pick them on my own."

"Fine by me. Bubba is a very nice person once you get the past that he was in prison three times." John commented. "Where is Sherlock? Didn't he came with you?"

"Oh, Sherlock stole my date and he is in the pub." Anderson winced on how stupid the sentence sounded; it was definitely the strangest sentence that he had said in a long time.

John raised an eyebrow at Anderson. "If he is not back by eleven I'll go and save him from Bubba. And I hope you learned your lesson for turning me orange."

Before he was even tempted to ask, Anderson decided to go and phone his mother and ask her if he could move back in with her as he had a horrible flat mate. She said no. The moment John left to go and get Sherlock from the pub, Anderson started his newest prank and he knew that his war wasn't over yet.

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Thank you for reading and if you have any ideas please write them and I will use them. I would like to have ideas for pranks if you have them as I can't think of any as I am not that creative in the art of doing pranks.


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